Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Homekeeper's Journal 1-19-2011

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In my homey kitchen …..
It's clean! It's clean! It's clean! And there is sticky rice soaking for lunch later today. Having a friend over for Bang Bang Chicken and sticky rice...haven't seen her in at least 6 years so I'm really looking forward to our lunch today and to meeting her cutie pie little boy!
My thoughts on being at home ……
I know this is where I belong...I just hate that I can't seem to "get it together" when it comes to being organized and keeping on top of clutter and cleaning. I don't want to be anywhere else, I love this job! But when I look back on from whence I came, I'm amazed. God is faithful. God is good. And God is not done with me yet...thankfully...
A constant habit I have of making my home comfortable is ….
Constant habit...hhhmmmm....I'm not sure on this one. My constant habits seem to be being inconsistent and being to out-of-sight-out-of-mind-y. If I had to choose something, it would be making delicious and nourishing meals.
If I could change the decor of my home ….
Definitely new furniture and family pictures on the walls. And less stuff, more open space.
What I want my children/spouse/other family to remember about my home is …
… that it was a comfortable, inviting place where they could be themselves and feel welcome. (copying from the Christian Homekeeper Network...I'm working on this one, but that is what I would like)
Home …
is where I want to be...with my family and friends...doing the work set before me and letting the love of Christ flow through me. I miss that mark way too often, but I'm constantly working toward that and I know that God is helping me get there.

Monday, January 10, 2011

A Simple Woman's Daybook: January 10, 2011

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FOR TODAY...

Outside my window...cold...snowy
I am thinking... of how to get everything done that needs done today

I am thankful for...my family, friends, church and freedom

I am wearing...my pj's and toasty warm robe, although I have showered already...didn't want to wake my son in getting clothes around. Kids are up, I ought to get dressed now!

I am remembering... the ways God has provided for us in times where there just seemed to be no way at all

I am going... to have to attend a funeral this week

I am currently reading...Taking Care of the Me in Mommy by Lisa Welchel

I am hoping... to be able to resist the temptation to eat sugar as I start a 21 Day Prayer and Fasting with my church

On my mind... letting go, or trying to anyway, of some "stuff" that impedes progress and helps feed chaos in my home

Noticing that... I just plain have way too much stuff. Wondering why I just can't get rid of it...

Pondering these words... How far will you let me go, Jesus? How abandoned can I get? ~Mike Bickle, The Bride of Christ Studies

In the kitchen...the dishes are done, the counters need decluttering, the floor needs mopped, and bread needs to get started

Around the house...the "mathom room" has been cleared out, thanks to the hard work of my husband and youngest stepson...now to start packing up out-of-season things and things I don't use often...to be inspected in a few months and sold/given away if not used

One of my favorite things... snuggling under mounds of blankets in a cool room on a soft, snowy winter's night

From my picture journal...
Beautiful, snowy scene behind our church Sunday

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

What Did You Just Ask Me?

Haven't blogged for a while...the days have been quite ordinary lately. Then one day you get up and everything's like the day before and the day before that and the day before the day before that...until...

In all fairness, my stepson did mention earlier today that he wanted to talk to his father and I after dad got home from work, so I knew something was coming. I really hate it when people say "I want to talk to you later" and then leave you hanging. Opens the door to all kinds of worries and imaginary crises...unless, of course, you're one of those eternally optimistic people who probably imagine winning the lottery, an end to war, a cure for cancer, or even a truly bi-partisan government who can put aside petty differences in order to make wise, fiscally sound decisions that will make all of America happy and blissful once again. But, I digress...

Even with the warning of some impending information that may or may not be good, I was completely shocked. Totally and completely shocked. Still am, really.

So what was this thing he needed to discuss with us? Apparently his mother wanted to come and visit him and his brothers and needed a place to stay...so could she stay in our spare bedroom for just one night?

Really. He actually asked us that. I'm not making this up just to create a sensational blog entry. He actually asked if my husband's ex could spend the night in our home. As if.

My husband was quite to the point: "No." and he walked back down into the basement, where he and the landlord were working on fixing the contraption in the basement ironically called a "furnace."

Thanks.  That left me there...stuck as I was because I was cleaning out our refrigerator, which had taken on a rather disgusting funk that could not be precisely pinned down without removing all of the contents and giving each one the Sniff Test. Loads of fun, really.

Number One really couldn't see what the big deal was. I tried to explain that it was completely inappropriate for an ex-spouse to spend the night in the home of her former and very happily remarried spouse.  Especially when the three of us really don't like each other all that much.  Even if we all had a "normal" (or maybe getting along and being friends isn't normal, I don't know...I do know the the dynamics here are strained and strange) kind of divorce relationship, it would still be completely inappropriate.

I suppose I should mention here that Number One is 20 years old. Legally an adult, yet still quite naïve to the complex issues that plague adults...especially when it comes to divorce etiquette.

Then, to make the Shock and Awe campaign complete, he asks if she could stay in the old building on our town lot referred to as a "barn." It really is a barn, as our century-plus home once sat out in the country.  It probably had animals in it at one time...now it's more of a storage area for I'm not even sure what...it doesn't belong to us, I don't ask questions. Or go in there much.

I said, "Are you kidding?"


Apparently not...he had actually thought this out. The plan included something about him pulling his car in there and she could sleep in his car.  In case you are reading this from a nice, warm climate...let me assure you it's quite chilly here in Northern Indiana...in January. I think this would be referred to as "grasping at straws." Although no straws were being extended, believe you me.

I was then informed that we "suck" as he stormed out of the house. Guess we're doing something right if he still disagrees with our decisions...(thanks, Sissy! <3 ya!)

It was truly heartbreaking, once you got past the audaciousness of the whole thing, to witness this young man's desperation to make this trip, which seems to hinge on whether or not his mom can find somewhere to stay, possible. It's been a while since he's seen her. I get that, I really do.  I'm sure right now he, and everyone he tells this story to, thinks we are cold, callous and heartless.  Some day, and I don't hope this for him at all, if he is divorced and remarried, he'll understand where we are coming from. Or at least will have the opportunity to understand.

And honestly, it's very unfortunate that his mother is in this position...however, it is not our responsibility to provide lodging for her. She's an adult, and while asking someone if she can stay with them while she is in town is not unreasonable, asking her remarried ex if she can stay at his place is completely and utterly outrageous.  I certainly hope this was Number One's harebrained idea and not hers. I'm just not sure what I'd have to say about it if she was the one who talked him into asking us that. 

But...I guess I have to give him credit for having the guts to ask it. And for not telling me I'm going to be a grandma. Big kudos for that. Big BIG kudos for that...

I do hope she can find suitable accommodations and that her and the boys can have a wonderful, healing and blessed visit together.  They all really need that. But it won't be happening here. And don't try to make me feel guilty by saying we should extend Christian charity to those in need...Jesus said pray for people and do good, turn the other cheek, etc. but he did not say anything about being a doormat. He wasn't a doormat when he tossed the money changers out of the temple. Jesus is kind and gentle and loving, but he does not "enable" people! 

So, it will be very interesting to see how this all unfolds. I really do hope the visit will work out for them. And I hope for the sake of sanity, peace, and all that is holy and good she plans on not stopping by any time soon. That's just where I am at the moment. God is working on that...I suppose all of this is part of His plan to work that "stuff" out of my heart. But really, God...seriously? Surely You jest...I know all about Your sense of humor...


Lord, please help this mother and her sons to be able to visit together. Bless her with a beautiful and relaxing place to stay in an environment full of your grace, presence and love. And please help Number One to understand why we just can't let her stay here...

Friday, December 10, 2010

A Strongly Worded Letter

I have threatened on many occasions to "write a strongly worded letter" to whomever is in charge of whatever I am upset/disappointed/irritated with, but I don't think I've actually ever followed through with that. It's an expression my husband and I use often, jokingly. That, however, changed today - when I redeemed some Speedy Rewards Points in an effort to be frugal while out and about and got way less than I bargained for. Here's the Strongly Worded Letter I just sent to air my grievances:
Hello,

I have been a Speedy Rewards member for many years now and have always been pretty happy with your system and the products you carry in your stores.

Today, however, I was EXTREMELY disappointed in the quality of the food items I redeemed a few thousand reward points on. Specifically, the Bacon Double Cheeseburger and the Cheeseburger, which I got for my son.

I can honestly say without any doubt or exaggeration they were the absolute worst burgers we have ever eaten. Completely disgusting, actually. And I highly doubt it had anything to do with "freshness". I would be very surprised to learn that there was ANYTHING resembling beef, or any type of meat, for that matter, in those burgers. The taste and texture were terrible! I had already left the store where I got them before I realized how awful they were and was in a hurry to get to my next destination, or I'd have gone back.

I am very disappointed that I used 2500 points on sandwiches that could only be called "food" in the wildest stretch of the imagination. This is the first time I have gotten any hot sandwiches at a Speedway store, and after this experience I don't think I will ever want to waste my points and take a risk like that again.

I would very much appreciate a refund of the 2500 points I used on those sandwiches today. And I'd like to encourage you to seriously consider a different supplier of hamburger patties for your hot sandwiches, preferably a supplier who actually uses ground beef instead of soy, which these very obviously were. And, in the interest of those who suffer from food allergies, clearly indicating on the label that there is a high amount of TVP in those "burgers" (or that they are 100% TVP, as I highly suspect is the case) would be very beneficial. I couldn't find the ingredients in the "nutritional information" on this website, and no longer have the wrapping to check and see if it is there. I do wish now I would have kept it.
I would also like you to know that I am a blogger, and will be posting my letter to you and your response, for which I eagerly await.  I am assuming that, in keeping with your President's statement of commitment to conducting its operations in accordance with both the law and the highest standards of business ethics and integrity, you will endeavor to ensure this long-standing member of your Rewards program is satisfied and my trust in your company's operations is not misplaced.
Thank you for taking the time to read this and have a very blessed holiday.

Sincerely,

Dawn Yoder
Of course, I probably should note that I am in no way attempting to disparage or libel Speedway Super America, but merely want to inform other consumers of the experience I had there as well as document their response to a very unsatisfied customer. This is the first time I have been so disappointed and dissatisfied while patronizing their establishments. I sincerely hope that they will grant my request of refunding the reward points I feel that I wasted today. Usually, we use those to get a lower price on gas for our van but today I thought I'd be frugal and not spend money eating out. Brilliant, I tell you...

And, as one who is trying to not eat "junk" as much as possible, I wrestled with the decision to get those "burgers" and decided once in a while won't kill us...probably. While we are still alive, I can honestly say I don't feel well at all tonight...not in a food-poisoning type of way, but more like I have just experienced an extreme chemical assault. If I had realized that "burger" on the label was merely a suggestion, not an actual representation of what was inside the wrapper, I never would have gotten them. I think I just discovered how we can win that war in Afghanistan...and where they've been hiding the WMD's...

I will follow up with whatever response I receive from Speedway Super America's Customer Service Team. Assuming, of course, my blog doesn't get shut down for mentioning "Afghanistan" and "WMD's"!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
UPDATE:

It is now Monday, December 20 and I have not yet received a reply to this message. I have sent another message, willing to give them the benefit of the doubt as anything can happen to an electronic message...including being accidentally deleted by one's spouse perhaps. I haven't asked my husband yet, but it is a plausible possibility. We'll see what comes of this...

Dear Speedway,

I sent a message on this site a week ago (Friday, December 10, 2010) and have not yet received a reply. I am hoping that something happened in the transmission of your reply, perhaps, or that my husband may have inadvertently deleted your email, because I surely do not want to believe that you are not going to address my grievance with the quality of your "burgers" and the the 2500 points I feel were wasted on them.

I realize that this time of year is a busy time for everyone, however, I believe that no reply from your company (if that indeed was the case) regarding a very unsatisfied customer is surely not in keeping with your claim to conduct your business according to "the highest standards of business ethics and integrity."

In case you have lost my previous message, I will copy it below for your convenience. And again, I eagerly await your reply and a resolution to this matter.

Sincerely,

Dawn Yoder
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Message originally sent on Friday, December 10, 2010:
(in the interest of space, you can read it above if you wish).

And the lovely message after I clicked submit was...

Thank You



Thank you for your interest in Speedway.
We will respond to all inquiries in a timely manner.

Perhaps we have a different opinion of what a "timely manner" means...

GREAT NEWS! Apparently, their response must have been deleted or missed somehow. I received another reply and not only did they refund the points I used, but also another 2500! That makes me very happy. Thank you, Speedway, for going above and beyond to restore this customer's confidence in you! 
 

Friday, December 3, 2010

DIY: Make Your Own Marshmallows...Really, You Can!

OK, so this is totally against all the "real foodie" in me...but in my quest to spend as little money on things as I can by making as many things as I can myself, I have wondered:
  1. Can I make a healthy, or healthier, marshmallow?
  2. Is it even possible to make your own marshmallows without the benefit of ginormous industrial equipment or magical woodland elves?
Well, as it so happens, I can at least answer one of those questions...and it's Yes, You Can Make Your Own Marshmallows In The Comfort Of Your Very Own Kitchen!  I found this neat video tutorial (via Money Saving Mom...if you haven't checked her site out yet do it now, it's great!) on the Denver Bargains site...check it out! And amaze your friends this holiday season with delicious, easy and inexpensive "gourmet" marshmallows!

Meanwhile, I'm going to see if it's possible to make a healthy marshmallow...since corn syrup is on my NO WAY JOSE list these days...

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Entitlement Mentality: From a Nation of Entrepreneurs and Hard Workers to a Nation of Whiners

We have a free, local paper here that has a column called "Speak Out." It has long been a source of amusement for me, to read the complaints (such as "we live in the United States of America but I don't understand why we have so many Canada Geese"), bizarre questions and various soapbox diatribes that people call in to have included in the column. Today, however, I just about had an aneurysm. 

There has been a slowly simmering discontent within me regarding the Entitlement Mentality that has what seems to be a death grip on the populace of this great nation. A nation forged out of adversity, by hard-working people, people who traveled thousands of miles in unfathomable conditions just to have a shot at the "American Dream", as well as people born here to families who knew the value and importance of taking care of their own. 

The blurb featured on the front page of the paper caused my jaw to drop and my dander to rise. I turned quickly to the column to read the whole comment, not wanting to take anything out of context, only to find that I was definitely NOT taking anything out of context. I will include the full comment here for your perusal:

We Are Struggling
 I'd like to see those presidents live on what we have to live on. Why do we have to struggle when they are not struggling?
 They could give some of their money to some of us other people like senior citizens and other people who don't have jobs. They could hand some of that money over to us.
 But they don't need it. They're already millionaires. Let them share it with us. We need it. They don't.
 I'd like to know if I am the only one who feels this way because it kind of makes me mad to think we have to struggle when they are not struggling at all.
 There are some weeks I don't even have money for groceries. If it wouldn't be for my little garden, I wouldn't even have any grocery money.

Let me start by saying that I am not a millionaire. I know what it's like to not know how we're going to pay the utility bill in the dead of winter, or the rent, or how to feed five people on $60 a week. I've even had a food stamp card. So I get struggling to make ends meet. And I feel for those who are in that position right now. And I wouldn't mind having some of what those millionaires have, either, for the record. It would sure make things easier here!

I don't know this person's situation, either, so it would be unfair for me to categorically include them in the masses inflicted with Entitlement Mentality. But it sure does seem that this person has a raging case of it by what they said.

So now, tell me, why do millionaires have to share their millions with you? To "hand some of that money" over to you? Just because you don't have any? How does that even make sense? To expect someone who has more than you to just hand money over to you because you do not, well, to me that sounds very childish. Because the underlying message here is that "it's not fair" that someone has more than you. 

When, exactly, did life become fair? Is it even reasonable to expect fairness in every area of life? Liberals have some good ideas...of course we should do what we can to make life better for others, but where I take issue is when it's demanded, or forced. That whole "redistribution of wealth" concept really doesn't work...just take a look at the countries who practice it. I can't say standing in line for hours to buy bread is really good for the collective. Life, by its very nature, is unfair! And there is nothing that any law, mandate, referendum, policy or political correctness can do to change that.

But that's what those inflicted with Entitlement Mentality apparently believe...that others, who may work harder (or just work, as the case may be), who become successful through educational opportunities (that are available to everyone, by the way, although some will just have to work harder than others to achieve success), planning, and making wise choices for themselves, have to hand over the wealth they accumulate to people who don't  take advantage of education, don't work hard at improving their lives, fail to plan, and make irresponsible decisions. Simply because they have what others do not. It really drives me nuts!

Of course, there are all kinds of situations and exceptions and people who really are down on their luck in spite of doing the right things. Those aren't the ones I'm talking about here.  They are the kind of people who will accept help, but still do what they can do get out of their situation and improve their lot in life. It's the ones who won't work, won't go to school, won't be responsible for themselves or the babies they create, and then expect everyone who has what they want and can't have, because of their own choices and irresponsibility, to cover their living expenses, pay their medical bills and buy them food. Or expect the government to do it for them.

Am I saying that those who are blessed with abundant financial means should keep it to themselves and never help anyone? Absolutely not! I believe part of being responsible with wealth includes giving to the poor and helping the less fortunate. As one with a heart to give to others as I am able, I consider it a blessing to be able to do just that. And as a follower of  Christ, I know that it is my responsibility, my duty, to serve others and give.

When did we go from a nation of people proud of working hard to become successful to a nation of people who expect the government, or the very wealthy, to provide for their every need? When did the role of government change from its proper role, to prevent crime and lawlessness, to its perceived role of Nanny, of Provider? Why have so many Americans fallen victim to Entitlement Mentality?

The proper role of government is to restrain crime of every sort. The problem of government is that it becomes the perpetrator of the very crimes it is supposed to restrain, except on a massive scale. This is why the Founders established the Constitution. Its purpose is to restrain government, giving it limited, enumerated authority. The purpose of government is not to redistribute the private property of its citizens, or to provide a benefit to one class of citizen, at the expense of the rest. When this happens, all classes begin to demand special benefits using the police power of government to extract it from their fellow citizens until you have anarchy. ~ Our Republic (emphasis mine)
It is really sad to see this nation deteriorating and deviating from the principles on which it was founded. It is sad to see people, who have so much to offer our country and our world, fall victim to hopelessness and despair and the illusion of security provided by our government. And it is absolutely maddening to hear people whining about the fact that others have more than they do. There will always be those who have and those who have not. At least in America...for the time being...you have opportunities to leave the Have Nots and join the Haves, if only you were to quit your whining, get off your butt, and do something about it.

If you expect the government to do for you what you should be doing for yourself, don't be surprised when you end up broke, homeless and ill. It's inevitable. Just look at Washington, DC...
~yeah, I said that...

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