Life on Purpose and Principle

Facing the Book

2012-02-01T10:45:00.000-05:00

If there was a 12-Step Program for Facebook addiction, I probably might have found myself in a meeting some night.

Hello, my name is Dawn. I’m a Facebookie. I’ve been on FB now for two years. At first, it was great…it was new, exciting, lots of fun…but then after a while, it started to take over my life…

I would look out at the rows of cold, flesh-colored folding chairs filled with others who struggle with this addiction and be met with knowing glances, slight nods, maybe even that far-off look one gets when reminiscing on something Back In The Day.

…I started finding myself on FB in the strangest of places, like the shower (I just had to reply to something RIGHT THEN, it couldn’t wait)…

Smiles, giggles, murmured sharing of their own Strange Places. A silent understanding of the urgency a FB post can have that can strike anywhere, anytime.

…It got to be that I couldn’t go anywhere without knowing I’d have the connection I needed to get my FB fix. My cell phone became permanently attached to me. And once I got that netbook…well, that was what pushed me over the edge really…

Dark clouds drift over the eyes watching me. They remember their own Edge. They remember what pushed them over. They despise me for reminding them.

…One day, I had a fleeting moment of lucidity. I realized that the reason every dish, glass, fork and pan in the house was dirty, the reason everyone was out of clean underwear, the reason every day got so far away from me was because of it. Because of Facebook.

A few tears now, as they go from despising me to empathizing with me. They have been there too. That’s why they were here this night in the church basement on those cold, hard flesh-colored folding chairs, surrounded by cement block walls doused in ecru…as if a fancy name for “whitish” would actually take away the institutional feel of those walls.

I decided to quit.

Applause. A few “yeah!'”-s. For a brief moment, I was someone they could admire. I had made that tough decision to quit.

Cold turkey.

Gasps. Heart-clutching. One poor lady began to shake uncontrollably. I had moved beyond Nobility and into the Land of Absurdity. What? Who does that? Who just quits FB cold turkey?

I’ll tell you who does that. Someone who realizes that time is an irreplaceable commodity that must be managed well if anything meaningful is to come out of its use. Someone who realizes that clean dishes and underwear, while part of the mundane, are vital to good health and comfort. They are part of the background on this set in which we play at life. Someone’s gotta do it…and unless you can pay someone to do it for you, YOU need to do it or delegate it properly.

Ok, so maybe I didn’t actually attend a Facebookies Anonymous meeting in a cold, cement block walled church basement with flickering fluorescent lights…but the thing about the dishes was true. And there was one day that my three year old didn’t have any unders, because mama was too busy on FB to do the laundry.

And so, as of January 1, 2012, I cut myself off of FB. And in this last month, my kitchen has been clean most of the time (debilitating FB addiction aside, housework and organization and time management have never come easy to me…), the laundry is caught up, and I am able to enter my Father’s rest on the Sabbath. It’s a wonderful thing.

But so is FB and the internet. They can both have a useful purpose. Morphine, after all, is very useful in treating excruciating pain. But with anything that has the potential to become a life-controlling addiction, the key is to use them responsibly. And so, as I return to the land of FB today, I do so with some rules:

I will not start my day off on Facebook
If the dishes are dirty, NO FACEBOOK
If anyone is out of any kind of clothing, NO FACEBOOK
If my husband needs my attention or assistance, NO FACEBOOK
If my children need my attention or assistance, NO FACEBOOK
And, most importantly, if I haven’t spent quality time with my God today, NO FACEBOOK

Now, if everything is in order…my worship and work are done…then I will allow myself a reasonable amount of time on Facebook. I suspect I will have to use a timer…because time really has a way of getting away from me. There is no Daytimer that can help me, trust me…

And if I find myself breaking the rules and my family comes to me hungry and naked as I sit at my computer completely absorbed in Facebook…I will have to cut myself off again, only the next time it probably ought to be permanently. Serving my Creator, my family and life in all it’s unpredictable bliss are far more important.

Really. I’m very sure of that. I think…be sure to watch my FB wall in case I change my mind (; And, if you see me on Facebook, don't be afraid to ask me if the dishes are done or if my family is running around naked.

4 Words to Never Say While Canoeing

2011-10-10T12:42:00.000-04:00

If you ever find yourself canoeing down a river…or worse yet, heading back upstream to the boat launch after having been on the river for a while so you can go home…I would like to caution you against saying four little words. There’s nothing inherently wrong with those words, in fact, they really are good words to say. Just not when you’re in a canoe. Heading upstream…

My husband wanted to check out a potential area for duck hunting, so we packed up his newly-camo’ed canoe and headed to a fish and wildlife area about four hours away. It was a beautiful day…I saw gorgeous fall foliage on the way and was able to read a really good book I’ve been enjoying recently.

A very nice guy helped get the canoe off the van at the boat launch and we set off down river. The scenery was beautiful, we saw all kinds of interesting things…blue herons, a boot, a crazy little house that looked like some place the team from Criminal Minds might end up at to investigate some gory crime (Dueling Banjos danced briefly through my mind as we floated on by), several eagles – even a male Bald Eagle. It was lovely and relaxing. And I enjoyed just spending the day with my husband.

We turned around to head back, which meant we were heading upstream. Against some pretty strong currents at times. We were very thankful for the trolling motor hubby had brought along. All was going well as we headed back to the boat launch.

And then…I had to go and silently whisper Four Little Words.

Like I said above, there’s nothing wrong with those four words. But, as I keep forgetting…they are just entirely too vague. They leave so much open to wild interpretation. I really should know better by now.

What did I say?

Here I am, so naively inviting God to speak...

In a moment of Creation-inspired awe and wonderment, I invited the God of the Universe…YHWH…Adonai…to speak to me. I wanted to hear what was on His heart. I wanted a glimpse of the multitude of thoughts He has toward me. Which are all good, according to my favorite verse:

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace (wholeness, well being, health, blessing) and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”
Jeremiah 29:11

Isn't this serene and beautiful?
Can you see why I was all caught up in Creation-inspired wonderment?

So there I was: heading upstream with my beloved, in awe of the beauty around me, filled with joy at being a Daughter of the King. Feeling fortunate to be part of God’s glorious and magnificent creation. And then…

GOD SPOKE.

He did not speak by tipping the canoe, for that I am very thankful. But, He spoke with an Object Lesson.

ob·ject lesson, noun \ˈäb-jikt-, -(ˌ)jekt-\ : something that serves as a practical example of a principle or abstract idea

Mere moments after offering up that silent supplication and posting via cell phone praise for the inventor of the trolling motor and the fine folks at Minn-Kota, the trolling motor got caught on a log. The new prop, fortunately, was spared any damage but the switch that controlled the speed of the motor was stuck on one speed, which was not Fast.

I thought I was prepared for our trip, I even had a little first aid kit packed and snagged some toilet paper from a Walmart restroom…just in case. But, we did not have any tools with us. What we needed was a long philips screwdriver. My husband tried every MacGyver trick we could possibly come up with. If only we had some gum, a paper clip and a comb…

We were then faced with paddling back, for the most part. Fortunately, the trolling motor was at least not stuck in reverse. But the current was so strong in some areas it didn’t help at all. And the river would randomly go from deep to so shallow our paddles were hitting bottom with each stroke – no way could you have the motor down in the water in those places. And we were several miles down river…this was not exactly what I meant when I said “Speak to me, God.”

But God was speaking, and what I was hearing was that whenever we decide to go our own way and do things in our own strength, it is just like trying to paddle upstream. You paddle, paddle, paddle and don’t hardly get anywhere. You wear yourself out and get frustrated. Things go wrong. You find that you are completely unprepared and completely alone. It takes longer to get where you were going, and often times it is right back where you started…because you went off on the wrong way to begin with.

I know I have been through this object lesson before. Several times. I’m pretty sure I don’t need to go through it again…only, we are currently trying to discern God’s will for our family. My husband is looking for a job, we are willing to go where God says to go – we just need to hear where…and when. I feel like now is the time to go, and we are pretty sure about where. But, I guess it’s always good to be reminded NOT to try to force things before their time and not try to do them in our own strength.

Our canoe trip adventure sure didn’t go the way we expected. Why that might have been a surprise is beyond me. But, we stayed dry and unharmed, learned that we work well together in adversity, and were reminded again how important it is to "go with the flow" when it comes to God's plans for our lives. And, in spite of it all, we had a really good time. Just ask my husband about the frog…

Don’t Miss That Train

2011-10-05T09:32:00.000-04:00

The older I get, the more I realize how important it is to make good decisions. The kind that don’t leave the bitter aftertaste of regret behind. The kind that bring enrichment to the lives of those around us, not just to ourselves. Even with that realization, though, it can still be hard to step out and do something new when the destination is unclear. But that is where faith is important...

I read something this morning that fits our situation these days very well. It’s in Time to Rejoice: Devotions Celebrating God’s Love by several Women of Faith authors. This particular selection was written by Lisa Whelchel and was called Catch That Train.

She talked about a time when her mom called her up and asked her to go on a bike riding trip in Vermont. Neither of them were “cyclists” and she hadn’t been on a bike in years. They really had no idea what to expect and were surprised on more than one occasion. The rest of the group were obviously experienced in such things…from their gear to their abilities.

Still, they didn’t give up. They made the best of it and enjoyed the trip.

What really spoke to me was the following passage at the end of the story:

I hate to think what I might have missed had we not impulsively decided to do something we’d never done before. Or if we’d been daunted by the fact that we didn’t have all the right training or equipment. Or if we’d given up when we learned that the journey would be longer and harder than we anticipated.

This wasn’t the first journey in my life when I truly didn’t think I could make it to the end. And I’ve certainly grumbled before like the children of Israel. But I learned that God was the one who set me on the path; He promised to go with me, and He would bring me to the destiny he planned for me from the beginning. I want to have the same attitude about these harder life journeys as my Nanny had about her life: to hop on that train. I’m sure God has something good planned!"

Her beloved Nanny always told her “Catch that train while you can because you never know if it will pass this way again.” So it is with opportunities in life. We have to trust that the Conductor knows where He is taking the train and that we will arrive at our destination.

I have to remember right now that God is in this and He knows what He is doing. It doesn’t matter if I have the right experience or equipment right at this moment – God always equips and empowers those He calls. We will have what we need when we need it, we only need to trust Him. And listen when He speaks. He will never let us down and always has good in mind for us. Don’t miss out on the best adventures God has for you by being afraid to hop on that train!

Coffee With the Enemy

2011-09-03T19:13:00.000-04:00

We all have people in our lives who rub us the wrong way. Some have even gone as far as to plunge a long, sharp knife deep into our back. So what do you do when God says “be a blessing to your enemy”? You have a choice to obey – or not – just like with anything else. But when God is asking you to step out and be vulnerable, He is not doing it to harm you. There is a greater purpose involved. We may never know what it is, but then that’s why HE is God and we are not. Fortunately, God created coffee on the third day and called it good. I completely agree. As for sharing with my enemy…well, I’m not real crazy about that but I’m doing it anyway.

I’m actually sitting in a local coffee shop right now. Waiting to meet with someone I honestly wish just did not exist. I’m going to buy this person coffee or tea or whatever. And I’m going to use a gift card that I won just yesterday. Because God said to do it. The worst part is that God also said “just listen.” I don’t want to “just listen!” I have an earful to give this person, if only I could. I imagine I will be nearly biting my tongue off by the end of it, but I’m going to do what God said to do. And I’m going to trust that He knows best. He knows what the purpose of this is. And He knows what the outcome will be. He even knows whether or not I will actually keep my mouth shut, something else I do not have knowledge of. My heart is <mostly> willing, but my flesh is about as weak as they come.

My guest is four minutes late. I came half an hour early, to kind of get my bearings and quiet my spirit as much as possible. Every time the door opens I cringe inside. I don’t want to do this. But now my guest has arrived…

Well, that was just weird. And awkward. And I don’t really know what to make of it. A lot of uncomfortable silence. A lot of talk about this that and the other thing. I made small talk. I agreed with some things that were said. But for the most part, I kept my tongue in check. Not like I was planning on going on some kind of rant and rave…although I could have reached down deep inside and pulled that knife out…and used it.

But…God said “just listen.” There was even an offer for me to get whatever I had to say off my heart, but I said “No, God said listen and that’s what I’m doing.”

I can’t tell you what a miracle that was. That I was obedient. That I was immediately obedient. And that I kept my tongue under control…well, that is definitely an amazing feat of biblical proportions, believe me!

What will come of it? I don’t know. I didn’t notify my guest that I planned on buying and they bought a drink before sitting down. So, I explained about the gift card and slid it over. I blessed my enemy today. Only good can come of that, right? I’m trying not to think about the times before when treachery followed blessing. I’m trying to trust that God will use this situation for the good of all involved.

I am afraid the other party thinks we will do more of this in the future. It’s not something I’m necessarily wanting to do. But if God says “Do It” then I will. I don’t have the privilege of seeing the Big Picture, so I don’t know how this odd-shaped piece fits into the puzzle. Guess that’s why He’s God and I am…simply not.

DIY Planner: Revised and Improved for 2011-12

2011-09-01T19:48:00.001-04:00

It’s that time of year again! Do you have your planner ready? Do you buy one already made or do you design your own? Last year, I learned that I can make my own planner very inexpensively. AND I could make it however I wanted. Determined to not end up with a bunch of pages unused because they just don’t suit my record-keeping style, I designed my own and took it to a local office supply store with a print center to have it coil bound. You can read about that here and see what that planner looked like. This year, I made some drastic changes…

I was quite surprised and irritated to find that I still had a bunch of pages that I didn’t use. It looked good, but that planner just did not suit my style. I was trying too hard I guess. After heading back to the drawing board with K.I.S.S. in mind (you know, Keep It Simple Sweetie), I finally had to come to grips with the fact that we are, in fact, UNschoolers. Unschooling does not lend well to traditional record keeping.

My biggest beef with trying to keep track of what we do every day is that the majority of our learning is cross-curricular. I don’t want to write an activity or lesson down in three different subjects every time. I want to write it down once and be done with it. And I would find myself agonizing over where to put something because I only wanted to write it down once…paralyzing the decision making process and driving me nuts.

So, I decided, why fight my nature? Why not find a way to embrace it in all its ~~disorganizedness~~ creativity? We don’t just “do school” at home…we learn where ever we are, whatever we are doing, whomever we are with. Life is our classroom! And something as large and complex as life is not going to be easily contained in little squares on an 81/2” x 11” piece of paper. Life is also messy and frequently goes outside of the lines.

I found a website called Homeschool Launch where you can download TONS of free worksheets, forms, and other helpful documents for home schooling. You can also create your own account to upload documents to share. You can find the forms I created for my planner this year at my page on Homeschool Launch.

What did I do differently? To start with, I had more time to put into designing the cover. Since we learn all year long, I chose pictures of things we did over the past year and this summer, such as my daughter using a magnifying glass on a scorcher of a day to start stuff on fire. We LOVE science!

Front cover...covered with pics of my kiddos!

The guy who did my planner there last year accidentally forgot to put something on the cover page before laminating and had to double-laminate it, which I really liked, so I asked them to do it again. Especially since the paper I chose this time was thinner.

On the inside cover, I made a copy of something I have hanging on our school cabinet. It’s an adaptation of something Nancy Campbell wrote in The Power of Motherhood. I figured it would be a good reminder, in case I ever forget how to homeschool…

I only have three, yes three, planner pages bound in this planner: a yearly goals sheet, an attendance sheet, and a yearly evaluation sheet. Well, there’s some monthly calendar pages, but more on that in a minute.

Yearly goals, right there when I open it up
so I don't write them down and forget them later!

Attendance sheet, courtesy of donnayoung.org
used this last year and really liked it.

Yearly evaluation, where we can write down
what worked and what didn't, what we liked or disliked
about the school year

Now this is where I got innovative. I bought six two-pocket folders without prongs when they were super cheap and had them bound in the planner. The first one will hold miscellaneous forms and records that we collect through out the year, such as important papers for Friday School, for example.

Miscellaneous forms and records and important papers
will go in here

I created my own monthly calendar pages for the year and printed them out on cardstock. I have them facing each other, and used the blank back sides as a place to jot down notes and reminders. I searched online for a few minutes while trying to create something fun and interesting for a place to scribble notes, looking for something resembling a yellow legal pad for a background or graphic I could use. Then it hit me – I have a color copier/scanner and a yellow legal pad. Duh. So, I grabbed the Sharpies and ended up with this:

I always need ample space to jot stuff down

I also need calendar pages to face each other so
I don't forget important dates coming up in the
next month

There is a set of two calendar pages in front of each folder. I used photo paper to print “labels” because it looks nicer. Not sure if the glue stick I used will sufficiently hold them after using it for a while, but that is easily fixed. I used Avery Design Pro to design the cover and the folder labels. Each folder will hold the Daily Learning Log Sheets for two months. This was the genius idea birthed at the drawing board. Planner pages don’t work for me because that is just not how I roll. This sheet has five large boxes to write lesson plans, activities and spontaneous learning opportunities. To the right are several check boxes with categories such as science, math, english, etc. This way, I can write in our unit study or when we stopped at a pond and observed the activity in the habitat or whatever and just check off what subjects were covered. I’ll print out 90 two-sided sheets of these and we will use them to record what and how we are learning each day. Of course, we can use more than 180, but that is to be sure we log in enough learning days to meet our state’s requirements.

Each pocket would only need to hold
15 sheets at the most. That's logging in
learning every day of the month!

I was very happy that the coil binding didn't
take up too much of the folder's edge so
the papers will still fit nicely.

I like having a full year’s calendar to look at in a place that is easy to find. Last year it was on the outside of the back cover. This year I decided I wanted it on the inside of the back cover. No particular reason, really. That’s just where I wanted it this time.

Always knowing where the whole year can be seen
is a huge benefit for me. I hate flipping through pages
to find things!

I was afraid it would be too bulky, but it’s really not. Of course, it’s not full of papers yet, either…

This isn't one of those fancy smart phones, just an LG Rumor2
but I thought it would give a decent size comparison on
how thick it is.

I would have preferred different colors for the folders…like orange and blue…but hey, they were only like 15 cents apiece or something like that. We are trying to do school free or as close to it as possible this year in order to save money for a family trip to California in a few months to see the middle of the oldest boys graduate from Marine boot camp. Guess how much this planner cost me this year? Less than last year!

orange polka dot paper, 25 cents each at Michael’s $0.50
two-pocket folders, 6 @ 15 cents $0.90
printing costs, text documents $0.60
paper (negligible, due to rebates making the ream
- practically free!) $0.05
printing costs, color glossy photos (paper was free) $0.10
double laminating, 8.5 x 11 coil binding $4.44
- 20% off coupon!
GRAND TOTAL…… $6.59

I’m really excited about using this planner/organizer this year. It’s simple. It’s flexible. It didn’t cost an arm and a leg. And, it’s got cute pictures of my precious children on it. What more could I want?

If you make your own planners, what do you do? Do you change it every year or pretty much stick to the same format. Or, are you still trying to find something that works for you?

A Reflection of the Heart

2011-08-29T06:20:00.000-04:00

This was my front porch a little over a year ago.
A big cluttery mess. Almost worthy of a visit from "Hoarders"

Have you ever just been sitting there in church, minding your own business, and all of a sudden God drops a megaton of revelation into your lap? And then you realize that He probably wants you to do something about that? Something that is most likely difficult and unpleasant? That’s what happened to me today, and it kind of tied up some loose ends for me in the Processing What I Heard At The Women Of Faith Conference I attended last weekend. Finally, I feel ready to blog about it, but I’m also left with some hard decisions to make.

That’s exactly what happened to me this morning at church. I’m just sitting there listening to the pastor, minding my own business. Not looking for the proverbial choir of angels to break out in the hallelujah chorus right above me, or even just one of those evil incandescent light bulbs to pop on over my head, destroying the environment in all its megawatt-ness. I just wanted to have a nice morning at church, you see. I didn’t want to have to come face-to-face with a difficult truth.

Let me back up a bit, so you can fully appreciate the revelation I received.

A few weeks ago, my bestie told me she won tickets to the Women of Faith conference in Indianapolis. She wanted me to go with her and that made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I went to one years ago, but only for one day…this was for both days! I know that someone who lives in a very hot place didn’t want us to go. We encountered quite a few obstacles, but in the end, God made it happen. We had a great time of bestie bonding, lots of laughs and some really yummy pitas! We also were served some quality "meat" from the speakers.

Dr. Henry Cloud talked about necessary endings (I definitely want to read his book by the same name) and how everyone needs a monkey in their cage to help them through stressful times. Sheila Walsh is one of those speakers that I could listen to for hours and hours. Something she said socked me in the gut: “Guilt says you’ve done something wrong, shame says you ARE something wrong.” Nicole Johnson said something that brought tears to my eyes, as I could so relate to this…”Are you there God? Did you see what happened? Because that really, really hurt.” She also said something that I need to examine further in my own heart: “God-anger will destroy our families, paralyze our husbands and terrify our children.” And Lisa Harper was great too. The thing that stuck out to me during her talks was that “all addictions are a disorder of misplaced worship.” Ouch…

I’ve had my share of heart-wrenching experiences, but I’ve never lost a child and I don’t know if I could get up in front of thousands of people to relive that even one time, let alone multiple times. But the testimony of God’s grace and tender mercy that Angie Smith shared is simply amazing and definitely encouraging. You can read about Angie Smith’s daughter Audrey, here at her blog. Just be sure to grab a couple of boxes of tissues. Lucy Swindoll was very positive and upbeat while encouraging us to live life with no regrets…I guess she was the balance to all the heartbreaking testimonies before her.

Between when my friend found out she won the tickets and now, I have become obsessed with watching the show “Hoarders” on Netflix. I don’t know what I’ll do when my free subscription is up, I really don’t like to pay for stuff like that but I just love this show. Partly because it inspires me to clean and declutter, partly because I can really empathize with those poor people. Many have had a tragedy occur in their lives that turns messy and disorganized into hoarding so bad that the homes are unfit for human, or even animal, habitation. I recognize some of their thought processes and justifications. I have experienced that feeling that comes over them when they try to part with something and just can’t. I can’t explain it, it’s almost like a dark shroud envelops you and you just can’t think of anything other than the anxiety you’d feel at getting rid of something. You simply must keep it, even though you haven’t looked at it in 10 years. And then I think, “Am I just one tragedy away from becoming one of those crazy cat-lady hoarders?” It’s scary to think that I just might be that close.

That being said, I have made significant strides over the years in overcoming clutter. I’ve found that as I have dealt with the internal junk and clutter, the external clutter becomes easier to deal with. I still have too much stuff, and having a three year old in the house doesn’t help, si I have resigned myself to the fact that for the next few years at least there will be a definite “lived in” look to our home. I can deal with that.

It wasn’t until church this morning that I made the connection between what I heard at WOF and have seen on Hoarders…and my heart. The speakers at WOF were amazing…each one touching on an area in my heart, mind or life that could use some attention. The main theme for the weekend seemed to be Letting Go. Letting go of the things that hold us back…the old wounds that hinder our ability to be all that God has designed us to be, the old thought patterns (or internal scripts as the psychologists on Hoarders call them) and ways of justifying the things in our lives that we are not particularly fond of (like my quick-flaring temper or my tendency to turn to food for comfort, for example). It’s easy to accept letting go of the bad things, but harder to let go of dreams yet unrealized and people we love and trusting God with those precious things.

What on earth, you’re probably thinking, does any of that have to do with “Hoarders”? As I sat there this morning listening to my pastor, I suddenly got this flash of an image in my mind, probably some conglomeration of all the hoarders’ houses I've seen in the past few weeks, and I realized that…

I am a Spiritual Hoarder

No, I don’t have thousands of bibles stacked all over my house or feel paralyzing anxiety over throwing away a church bulletin. God showed me that I have rooms in my heart that are, just like the homes on that show, packed from floor to ceiling with junk. It’s been there for decades. It’s dirty. It’s unhealthy. I don’t even know what most of it is because I haven’t seen it in years. And yet, I can’t get rid of it. I can’t let it go. I actually feel anxious at the thought of throwing it out without looking at it, touching it, reliving it. And I can’t bring myself to to that, either.

God wants me to have a clean heart. I want me to have a clean heart. But I don’t want to go through an excruciating process to get one. Our pastor read out of Leviticus 6:9-13

9"Command Aaron and his sons, saying, 'This is the law of the burnt offering: The burnt offering shall be on the hearth upon the altar all night until morning, and the fire of the altar shall be kept burning on it.10 And the priest shall put on his linen garment, and his linen trousers he shall put on his body, and take up the ashes of the burnt offering which the fire has consumed on the altar, and he shall put them beside the altar. 11Then he shall take off his garments, put on other garments, and carry the ashes outside the camp to a clean place. 12 And the fire on the altar shall be kept burning on it; it shall not be put out. And the priest shall burn wood on it every morning, and lay the burnt offering in order on it; and he shall burn on it the fat of the peace offerings. 13 A fire shall always be burning on the altar; it shall never go out.

I’ve heard this teaching before, about keeping the altar clear of ashes. Keeping the junk out of our hearts. But somehow, in light of realizing that my heart has too many areas full of garbage, it just really seems to hit home. I need to let God into those rooms. I need to let Him in to burn it all up. And I need to be diligent in keeping the ashes cleared. Do you know what happens to a fire when the ashes are not removed? It chokes and dies. God says the fire is to always be burning on the altar…and if my heart is the altar, do I want the holy fire of God to burn out within it?

The hoarders on the show agree to let a team of people come in and clear out the junk in their homes. Other people come in to clean areas that haven’t seen a broom or soap or water in years. It’s nasty work in a lot of cases. I am truly impressed by the gentleness, respect and grace they show to the hoarders. In fact, a couple episodes showed people praying beforehand, and one in particular was a group of ladies from a maid service…who prayed to be a blessing to the person and ended it in Jesus’ name. That kind of blew me away.

I have had my share of shame so I know the feeling all too well, but I can’t fully imagine the shame associated with the amount of filth in some of these homes. I cried when one lady shared that her own mother would tell her all the time that she hated her and wished she’d never been born or that she had given her away. I have long believed the condition of our hearts is reflected in our homes. This lady basically lived in a landfill. She felt worthless and unlovable. I just wanted to hug her and tell her that she is not worthless. That Jesus loves her. That He wanted her, even if her mother didn't. What a waste of a precious life – she was in her 70’s I think.

I know that as the rooms in my heart are cleared out, that the Father will be gentle and loving. He will not condemn me or shame me. He will clean up the mess in my heart and make it beautiful, just as He always intended for it to be. But once again, it’s my choice. It’s always my choice to make…

This is my front porch after some serious decluttering. A beautiful, cozy space. This is what I want my heart to be like...

The K12FREEHOMESCHOOL & Mimi Rothschild Experience

2011-08-10T08:33:00.000-04:00

Some time ago, I wrote a series of posts on my experience with K12FREEHOMESCHOOL and Mimi Rothschild. I did this for two reasons…one, to truthfully share my experience – there are some unflattering accounts out there on the web and I felt that I should share my own experience in the hopes that those considering joining the academies that are run by Mrs. Rothschild can use it to make an informed decision. But, there was also another reason…to use this experience to (hopefully) attract more readers to my blog. I didn’t stop to consider the ramifications of how I presented the information.

Since I can be long-winded and detailed, I broke the story up into three parts. I reasoned that since it was such a long story, people would be more likely to read three shorter posts instead of one big, long one. It also gave me a chance to practice writing in a way that would entice readers to come back and find out what happened.

But…would they? What if they just read the first one or two posts, the ones that outline the not-so-flattering parts of my experience and didn’t read the last post which show how the whole thing turned out? Is that helpful or hurtful to those involved? I certainly don’t want to hurt Mrs. Rothschild or her business, so I have made the decision to consolidate all three posts into one. I’ll summarize my experience before going into all the details…so, you can read it all or not…but please, at least read the summary. I want you to get the whole picture, not just bits and pieces. I have cut and pasted the original blog posts and have changed nothing. The links to the other “parts” will lead you to the original page, but that has been changed to lead you back here. I don’t want anyone just picking the bad parts to link to.

And so…if you’re interested in all the details, pull up a chair grab a cup of coffee and stay a while. If not, I hope that you’ll at least read the summary with careful consideration.

In January of 2011, I looked for an online program to use in our homeschool. I was dealing with some health issues that made keeping up with everything difficult and was hoping to find something affordable to relieve some of the pressure on me.

I came across K12FREEHOMESCHOOL and loved that there were basic classes that were tuition-free…with our tight budget, that was perfect! I enrolled my daughter in 5 classes and waited for the discs to arrive. But while I was waiting, I looked around on the parent’s forums and it seemed like it wasn’t well maintained and a few parents were complaining about some things, like not receiving materials. I started looking around on the internet and came across some accounts of experiences with K12FREEHOMESCHOOL and Mimi Rothschild that made me begin to fear that I had, perhaps, fallen for a scam.

The disks arrived as promised, we started the classes without any problems. My daughter enjoyed the classes and I even began to see some improvement in the areas she was struggling in and was very happy about that.

After a couple weeks, it was the end of the month and when the new month started, I discovered we couldn’t log in until a mandatory donation was paid. I was irritated that there was only option for the donation amount – $24.95 – and logged into the live chat again for help. I was told that the amount was fixed and couldn’t be changed and that was made clear on the website. I argued that when I enrolled, it said it was a “free-will offering”! A “mandatory donation” is not a free-will offering, it’s a fee! I was told that there was nothing that could be done about it, that’s just how it is and once the full amount is paid, then we can log in and use the academy again.

Now, I really felt like I had been scammed. This was not what was portrayed on the website when I enrolled my daughter. As a safety precaution, I cancelled my debit card. I wrote a strongly-worded letter to Mrs. Rothschild about how disappointed I was that an academy that portrays itself as “Christian” would conduct its business in such an un-Christlike manner and that I was sending the disks back.

After a few days, I got a phone call from Mrs. Rothschild herself. She apologized for the experience I had and explained that she had been going through some personal difficulties that made it hard to keep up with the academy. She explained that her son had unexpectedly died the year before and then shortly after, her husband was diagnosed with cancer and during dealing with all of that, there were some issues with her staff and the website. Several families had signed up believing it was free, only to find the same thing I did, that we couldn’t use the site without paying a “mandatory donation.”

Mimi also refunded what I had paid for the shipping cost to receive the disks and offered, if I wanted, to send them back so we can continue with the academy and that she would make sure we (as well as all the other families that had enrolled during the same time as we did) could use the Academy for free until the end of June. After praying about it, we decided to give it another try. I didn’t have to give my new debit card number and she did all that she promised to do. She even sent me a lovely devotional journal.

I have corresponded with Mimi several times since all of this happened. I really don’t feel that she is a conniving, scheming person bent on taking over homeschooling, as one website has portrayed her. She went above and beyond to correct the wrongs and apologized for everything. I don’t feel that the gift of the devotional journal was any kind of “bribe” or attempt to butter me up. I feel that it was a sincere offering of reconciliation.

Now, I know that I don’t really know Mimi aside from the scathing reviews online by someone who may have an axe to grind and her own words. I can’t say for sure that her husband does indeed have cancer, nor can I verify that her son had died (only because I don’t know his name so I can look into it) and it’s possible that she was just saying those things to gain my sympathy. But, I really do feel that she was sincere in all her communication with me. In my spirit, I feel that she was honest with me and I lift her and her family and business up in prayer.

Although I initially had some issues with the academy, in the end I was very satisfied. My daughter enjoyed the classes, I enjoyed some relief from planning and the stress I was under at the time. I don’t regret at all my decision to enroll my daughter in the Academy. Budget constraints this coming school year will prevent us from using the Academy again, but if we had the extra money I would enroll her in a class or two. My daughter had expressed to me that she did not want to do all her classes online this time…not because of the academy, but simply because she wants to do school like we usually do…because she likes to spend time with me. That made my heart smile to hear that!

What follows is the original series of posts consolidated into one. I simply cut and paste, I did not change anything. This is a true account of my experiences…

If you’ve been homeschooling for a while, you’ve probably heard about Mimi Rothschild and her Academies. Do a google search for her and you’ll find lots of opinions, some good, a lot not so good. How do you discern the truth from disgruntled people with an axe to grind? There is a lot of information on the internet…but as Clarence Day from The Crow’s Nest once said, “Information's pretty thin stuff unless mixed with experience.” It’s been on my heart for some time now to honestly share my own experience with K12FreeHomeSchool and Mimi Rothschild. It is, of course, up to you to decided whether to believe what you read, whether on this blog or somewhere else on the internet, or not.

HOMESCHOOLING FITS OUR LIFE AND ALL ITS SURPRISES

We’ve homeschooled from the beginning, and it’s something I really enjoy. Oh sure, some days are better than others…and then there’s some days where I want to load up the kids and drop them off at the nearest public education institution…and then check my self into an institution on the way home. But, one of the things I love about homeschooling is how flexible it is, and how easily you can alter or change your school program when life throws a curveball at you.

My curveball, or curveballs, rather, were an unexpected and complicated pregnancy and the subsequent delivery of one Very Demanding Son, who has grown into One Very Busy Preschooler…and then Some Ongoing Health Issues that have made it difficult to homeschool. Or do housework. Or function normally some days.

K12FREEHOMESCHOOL…A DREAM COME TRUE?

So, when I came across a link to K12FreeHomeSchool and checked out the site, I was very excited! Could this be the reprieve I need to get myself together and to manage things better? My daughter seemed kind of bored with our regular routine, and frankly, I was too. She loves the computer programs and online sites we’ve used as part of her curriculum, so why not?

The other appealing factor was that it was a Christian school. It is very important to us to teach our children not only academics, but sound Biblical principles. That’s just not something they teach in public school anymore. So, to find an affordable online Christian academy seemed like a dream come true!

ENROLLMENT PROCESS AND CHECKING OUT THE SITE

I went through the enrollment process and chose four core classes: math, science, English, and social studies. These classes were listed as tuition-free, there were other classes such as health or art and music, that had a substantial tuition amount, which was beyond our budget. Whenever I had questions, I was able to get in contact with someone on the the Live Chat feature who answered my questions satisfactorily. There was a $4.95 shipping fee to send the discs we needed for each class, so the total for all four classes was $24.75. You are required to keep a debit/credit card on file, which I was a bit uncomfortable with because if there was a mistake in billing or an extra charge I was unaware of it could be problematic with our lean bottom line, but then at the same time I do understand that people can be unreliable and not pay for things and any school or business needs funds to operate.

According to the site, the academy appreciated a monthly Freewill Offering, which is totally understandable. There was an offering form you could complete, and I found it interesting that the only option seemed to be the suggested $24.95. Since I planned on contributing what our budget allowed, and at a later time, I didn’t look into that all that much.

After I paid for the shipping, I was able to log into the parent and student websites, so I logged in and started looking around. In the forum area, I was a bit unsettled that there weren’t more messages, as in answers to parent’s questions about the program or problems they were having with the discs or payments. There were a few responses from academy staff, but mostly it was people looking for help and not finding it, and then complaining about it. Also, the forum posts were very sporadic, hardly any current, and some going back to 2009! It didn’t seem to me like it was administered very well.

I decided to do what I really should have done to begin with…a little investigating.

Find out what happens next in Part 2!

As I began writing about my experience, I realized that this would be an incredibly long post, so I’ve decided to make it a serial blog post. In Part 1, I chronicle why I sought out a program like K12FreeHomeSchool, my experiences with the enrollment process and checking out the site and why I decided to do a little investigating. This post, I’ll share what my investigation uncovered and continue sharing my personal experience. I hope you’re ready for the next installment!

GOOD HEAVENS, WHAT HAVE I DONE?

I did a search on “K12FreeHomeSchool complaints” and that is where I first came across the name, Mimi Rothschild, along with hit after hit about K12FreeHomeSchool. It was quite disconcerting to see “DISTRAUGHT FAMILIES SEEKING TO EXPOSE FRAUD BY MIMI ROTHSCHILD AKA…” and text following stating “For years there have been complaints against Mimi Rothschild's companies. .... I 've left out many more complaints, but you get the picture.” I started to get this sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach that maybe I had made a mistake.

Good judgment comes from experience, and often experience comes from bad judgment. ~Rita Mae Brown

I read many statements by clearly unhappy people about the way the academy was run. Complaints about not receiving materials (or even the materials themselves), not being able to get videos or discs to work, and a host of complaints about the apparent lack of customer support – emails never answered, no phone number to call or if there was a phone number, you could never get a hold of anyone, rude staff, etc. Particularly distressing for me was one lady’s account of having returned the discs as directed only to have been charged over $200 for not returning them (there is a $10 fee per disk for not returning them). We are a one income family on a very tight budget so seeing this type of thing is not encouraging at all…especially when my debit card is on file with the academy.

There is one person in particular that seems to either have a very substantial case against or has made it a personal mission to “get” Ms. Rothschild. There is even a lawsuit involved - Ms. Rothschild has sued her because she believes this person has libeled or slandered or libelously slandered her and her academies. This was starting to look like one sticky wicket.

THE PROOF IS IN THE PUDDING, SO TO SPEAK

Being a bit uneasy about the endeavor upon which I had just embarked, I sent an email to inquire about when I should expect our discs to arrive. After a couple days, the email was returned…I don’t remember the exact error listed, but it wasn’t the standard “undeliverable” error. Still, when the website says email is the fastest way to get a response, and two days later it’s returned unanswered, well, that doesn’t look so good either. So, I logged onto the Live Chat, got a person just about right away, and asked about the shipment of the discs. I was told I they were shipped and I should receive them within 7-10 days. Ok…nothing to do now but wait. If we didn’t receive the discs, well then, that would help me make up my mind about this academy for sure.

On the seventh day, we received the discs as promised. I was very relieved, and decided that we would give it a try and see what happens. We had no problems with the discs working or logging into and using the parent or student websites. There was a bit of a learning curve, of course, in learning how to navigate and use the site, but overall it was pretty easy. Everything was going along splendidly (aside from one day that we couldn’t log in, which after another Live Chat session I learned it was due to an ice storm in their area that knocked out their servers) until the end of the month.

On January 30, I logged in to get my daughter started on her day’s school work, only to find a message directing me to complete the required donation form before proceeding. So, I went to the donation form as directed, where once again the only option was to “donate” $24.95. There was a link to the donation form in a sentence on the right (which had mysteriously disappeared the next time I was on that page), so I clicked on it and was able to put in my own amount instead of the $24.95 and completed the process. There was a message thanking me for my contribution so I assumed it went through.

I waited a bit before trying to log on, but was not able to. So, once again, I contacted someone on the Live Chat feature. That was where I learned that it was not a Freewill Offering, as I believed. The person I chatted with this time, however, was quite rude and not helpful at all.

After stewing about it and talking to my husband, we decided to cancel our debit card, return the discs and withdraw our daughter from the academy. She was very upset about the whole thing as she really liked the coursework and activities the academy provided. I sent the discs back, along with a strongly-worded letter addressing my disappointment and dissatisfaction with the way the academy handled its business, especially in light of the fact that this was purported to be a Christian academy.

I never expected to receive a response from Ms. Rothschild. And after reading a couple accounts online of other people’s interactions, I wasn’t sure I wanted to anyway.

So, how did all this end? Find out in Part 3...

If you’ve read Part 1 and Part 2, you’re up to date on my experience with the academy and Mimi Rothschild so far. This final installment will reveal my own personal contact with her as well as what conclusion I came to after reflecting and praying on the whole matter.

CELL PHONE SURPRISE

Fridays are my errand-running days. My daughter is enrolled in a local homeschool support program where she is in classes for four hours each Friday. She loves it – she gets a little taste of what “real” school is like, more socialization opportunities, physical education and a locker. Mom gets time to run errands with Mister, although some days it’s more fun than others to have Li’l Busy Man along to “help” mommy.

The Friday after I had sent the discs back, I was in the drive-through line at the bank when my cell phone rang. The caller ID showed a Pennsylvania number that I didn’t recognize and I almost didn’t answer it. It never crossed my mind that it could be Mimi Rothschild, but that’s exactly who it was. The connection was very bad and she said she’d call back when she got to her office and could use a land line. I wondered if she really would, but when I was in an Asian grocery store picking up a 50 pound bag of khao niao, my cell phone rang again and it was Mimi. I said a quick prayer that the conversation would go well - not only that she would be pleasant to deal with, but that I would as well and that we would be able to resolve this issue in a way that honored God.

APOLOGIES AND EXPLANATIONS

She apologized profusely and expressed her disappointment about what had happened and said that she would be dealing with her staff, possibly including firing someone. Not just because of what had happened to me, but because this type of thing had been happening, apparently, for some time and there were many families affected by this.

She continued to explain about some things happening in her life that made it difficult for her to be on top of her staff and the goings-on at the academy. They were also making the switch from being a donation-based service to a monthly fee-based service and the webmaster, who had assured her that everything was copacetic, either made a mistake or lied about it because clearly leaving wording on a website that leads one to believe a free-will offering is, indeed, an offering that is freely made of one’s own volition and not mandatory for using the service is at least confusing if not misleading.

I don’t feel that going into detail about all of what has been going on in her family’s life is really the thing to do here – I told her I was going to blog about this experience, but have not asked her permission to reveal the details. I would appreciate the same discretion myself. But suffice it to say, I can certainly see how dealing with some truly tragic and devastating circumstances such as those would make it difficult to stay on top of everything going on in a person’s life. I know I would have a hard time as well.

The whole time I was listening to her explain things, there was such an internal struggle going on for me. I don’t know this lady…I’ve read some really unfavorable things about her on the internet…she could just be making all this up, how would I know? Yet, I want to believe the best about people, I want to believe what she is saying is true, and I don’t want to hold a grudge against her.

SINCERE RESTITUTION OR A BRIBE?

She offered to refund whatever I had paid, including the cost to send back the discs I had returned by certified mail. She also said that anyone who had signed up within a certain time period, during which all the confusion arose over whether it was a free-will offering or not, would be able to use the service for free until the end of August, 2011. If we wanted to re-enroll our daughter, we just needed to let her know and she’d send the discs back to us at no charge. I told her I’d have to discuss it with my husband and I’d let her know. We did decide to let our daughter continue on in the school because she really liked it, provided, of course, that Mimi followed through with what she said.

And she did. She even sent me a very nice devotional journal and when one of the discs we needed was overlooked and had to be sent to us, she included a book for my daughter as well. Some may think she’s just trying to bribe me or butter me up…but I have chosen to believe, in the absence of any evidence to the contrary, that she was doing her best to right how I’d been wronged. Not only was I disappointed and felt deceived, but I was also very much inconvenienced with the whole affair. As a Christian, I believe it is right and proper to not only right whatever wrong has been committed, but to go above and beyond what is expected, just as Jesus has done for me. I don’t deserve his death, or the continued mercy and grace He lavishly pours out on me…and I am the one who did the ‘wronging’, not him!

TO BELIEVE OR NOT TO BELIEVE...

I can’t answer why others have written such horrible things about her, maybe there is truth there…maybe they just have an axe to grind…maybe they are just miserable people who are not happy unless others around them are miserable. She talked a bit about the lawsuit I had read about and said that she had offered to fly the other party out, at their expense, so they could see for themselves the office and staff but they refused. Again, it is her word over theirs…I can only go by my own experience.

While I initially had a disappointing experience, I do feel that Mimi was sincere. I truly hope that I am not wrong in deciding to believe her story…I have been praying for her and her family, and text her from time to time to let her know I am thinking about her and praying for them. I also pray that if the accusations swirling around on the internet are unfounded, that the Lord’s justice will prevail…well, regardless of the veracity of the accusations, that the Lord’s justice will prevail in this situation.

NO EPIC WOULD BE COMPLETE WITH OUT A MORAL…

The moral of this story is, of course, buyer beware and be sure to investigate anything on the internet…but also, don’t just believe everything you read in the blogosphere. I really believe, based on my own experience, that…in spite of the plethora of damning blog posts out there…Mimi Rothschild was sincere in her apology and truly wanted to make things right for me. I declare that every word I have written about this situation is true, to the best of my knowledge, and I have not written this to mislead anyone – only to provide an honest assessment of my interaction and experience with Mimi Rothschild and K12FreeHomeschool.

I encourage you also to pray about all decisions you make, especially those that affect your children and their education, whether you homeschool or not…and listen to what God tells you.

Fool me once, shame on you…fool me twice, shame on me…

Gunked Up Stoves and Hearts

2011-08-02T12:09:00.000-04:00

Does God use the ordinary and mundane things of life to speak to you about deep, spiritual matters? What spiritual lesson could one possibly learn while cleaning a stove anyway? What started out to be a post centered on cleaning, procrastination and elbow grease has turned out to be something much more profound.

When we moved into the house we live in now, the stove in the kitchen had a lot of gunk burnt on around the burners. Like carbonized…nothing I tried would get it to come off. I thought about using a knife or something to chisel it off, but I was afraid that I’d ruin the surface of the stove, so I left it alone. After a while, I got used to the way it looked and even though I hated it because it looked like I never cleaned the stove, it eventually bothered me less and less. There was nothing I could do about it, I thought, so why bother.

Periodically, I’d get an urge to try again to get that gunk off the stove. I’d try some new cleaner or cleaning tool. I’d have minimal success. I’d give up and once again go back to not noticing the burned on, carbonized, black nasty gunk on the pretty white stove top.

Yesterday, I tried again. I got out a can of scouring powder and a scrubby pad. It seemed to be working, then I thought “Well, that’s probably just new stuff…it’s probably not working on the old gunk.” I wanted to give up…it’s been 90+ degrees and humid like a rainforest here for what seems like years this summer. I don’t really want to be scrubbing my stove, to be honest. Then, I considered using a knife again.

What did I have to lose? It couldn’t possibly look worse than it did right then…right?

This burner is only half as bad as the main burner I cook with.
I forgot to take a picture of that one!

I grabbed an old steak knife that would barely cut butter and went at it. I was surprised, and pleased, to see that it was chipping off easier than the one time before that I tried this technique (and discovered it left little marks behind). Perhaps the scouring powder had loosened things up this time. I carefully hacked away at the burnt on, carbonized, black nasty gunk on the nice, white stove top.

As I was working on this, it occurred to me that this gunked-up stove top was a perfect analogy for a deep, spiritual principle. Leave it to a blogger, huh? I thought about how we’d lived in this house for nearly four years…how many meals I’d cooked on that stove…how many times I’d cleaned it, but only the surface…not the deep down, stuck on, burnt on nasty stuff. I’d hated the way it looked that and yet was able to ignore it for the majority of that time. And was able to justify not doing anything about it because I was afraid of ruining it and upsetting the landlord.

Then, I thought about things in my own heart…which I want to be nice and clean, pretty and white as snow. There’s things that dirty up the surface and are easily wiped away…and then there are the things that are black and stuck and won’t come off without a fight. Things that have been there for years and years. Things that I hate, and yet can overlook because after a while, you just get used to it being a part of you. Cleaners don’t work. Scrubby pads don’t work. It takes a knife to remove those old, nasty black spots on my heart.

But, I’m afraid.

Afraid of the work involved. Afraid of the pain. Afraid it might change me too much. Afraid of what others would think, even. But shouldn’t I be most afraid of upsetting the Lord of my heart by not tending to those things? God is good. God is for me, not against me. Pain is not always bad, if it brings life and beauty in the end. And He promised never to leave me or forsake me, so why should I be afraid?

I finally got the stove top clean. There was only one burner area that showed any kind of evidence of being hacked at by a dull steak knife. Minimal scarring, really. Did it detract from the beauty of the stove top as a whole? Maybe, if you focused on that. But just taking a look at the clean stove top, it looked new. And I finally loved my stove, which has served me well for years and helped me to prepare nourishing meals for my family. I no longer felt ashamed for anyone to see it, either. It was a nice feeling.

This morning, I cooked on my lovely “new” stove. I made a pot of oatmeal for breakfast. I wasn’t paying attention and it began to boil over…leaving a nice gloppy mess on my clean, white stove. The analogy continues…if we don’t pay close attention to what is in our hearts and minds, they are easily soiled again.

Watched pots never boil...but unattended pots boil over

I cleaned it up right away. I didn’t let it sit there. I didn’t ignore it so it would become a black nasty spot that would be difficult and painful to remove. The stove is once again nice and clean…

Almost looks like a brand new stove again!

…well, except for the back part, which apparently had the paint scrubbed off at some point. I think I can get some appliance paint maybe and fix that. But at least the area where I prepare food daily doesn’t look dirty and nasty anymore. Thanks, God…You have such a way of using the ordinary to speak to me about things that are extraordinary, like your love, faithfulness, forgiveness, mercy and grace. I love You!

Love, Lies and Internal Tapes

2011-07-11T10:31:00.000-04:00

If you truly understood that God loves you, it would transform your life. Every area. You would never be the same again from the moment you accepted that truth. So why do so many people struggle with moving beyond “knowing” that God loves us (because, after all, that’s what the smiley faces tell us) and believing that He does? What stands between reason and faith?

thoughts…

God’s word is full of His promises and His declaration of undying, unconditional love for us. We read it, we hear it on the radio, and in the pulpit on Sunday mornings. Other people tell us. And we even say it ourselves. But when we take a look at how we live what we believe, there is often a discrepancy between head-knowledge belief that God loves us and hearts that believe without a doubt that He does. And if we look very closely, and listen carefully, we will most likely see that while we know we should believe God loves us, and think we do, our internal dialogue tells a completely different story…

“If God really loved me, He wouldn’t let me suffer like this…”

“God must love her more than me, look how “blessed” she is while I struggle just to get by…”

“God only loves me when I get it right…”

Our thoughts are a combination of endless input from those around us, from the media, from what we read or listen to. Our "original" concepts of ourselves and of God and others may not be as original as we think they are sometimes. Do the advertisements on TV tell you that you're too fat? Did your father tell you that you were incompetent? Did your group of friends talk about the neighbor down the street at your last coffee klatch? Our minds take in so much data, and left to its own devices the mind can truly make a mess of all that information.

role models…

Our view of God as a Heavenly Father is often shaped by our experiences with our earthly fathers. If you father abandoned you, if he abused you, if he was harsh, demanding and critical, it can be hard to not think of God in the same light. Was your father loving, kind and supportive? How blessed you are! But even then, all it takes is a little seed planted at the right time and a harvest of doubt can be reaped.

lies and feelings…

There are at least two things that can get in the way of believing in your heart what your mind already knows. Lies and Feelings. Satan, who is the Father of Lies, is really good at whispering little questions in our ears…questions that get us to doubt the Truth of God’s word. "Did God really say that?” … “Is that really what He meant?” And sometimes, he’s not subtle at all…“He promised to meet all your needs, so where is He now that the mortgage is due and you don’t have the money to pay it?” Those little seeds of doubt can take root and grow into bitterness, envy, and anger at God.

Then there’s our Feelings. We’re supposed to have “childlike” faith, right? That’s what Jesus said:

“I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it” (Mark 10:15)

Receiving God’s love like a little child does not mean that we let our emotions, which are often immature, rule our decisions. We receive God’s love by believing that He loves us, just as our own children so readily believe that we love them. But, their immature emotions will often lead them to the conclusion that we don’t love them…if we don’t give them what they want or let them do something they want to do. We have the same tendencies toward God at times, too. We need to readily believe, as a child, while exercising self-control over our emotions, as adults do…or should, anyway.

When we let our childlike Feelings reason for us in difficult situations, we can also end up feeling bitter, resentful and angry toward God. We can feel like he’s being mean…just like mom is a big meanie when she tells her three year old that he can’t have cookies for breakfast. The child doesn’t understand that eating sugary, unhealthy cookies for breakfast can ruin his appetite for healthy, nourishing foods that his growing body needs to mature and to build a strong immune system to protect against illness. Mom is really looking out for his best interest, she is protecting him and showing him love – because she cares about even little things like that and because she knows something the child doesn’t. The lack of understanding on the child’s part does not change, diminish or remove the love of his mother.

take a look inside…and weed the garden

If you struggle with really believing that God loves you, take look inside for a moment. Listen to yourself as you think about the difficult situations you face…what are you saying? Is it really true? Is it a lie? Examine your feelings, too…what are they telling you? Are they ruling your thoughts and decisions, or are they under control? And, ultimately, do the thoughts and feelings you have line up with what God’s word says? If not, you need to feast upon the word and intentionally spend time with God, letting Him reveal His true character to you…which is Love.

Anything that does not agree with God’s word is a lie. It will produce fruit in your life, if you allow it to take root and grow, but that fruit will be rotten and destructive. Take time every day to pull the weeds out of your heart and mind. Ask God to show you the things you believe that are contrary to His word.

be encouraged…

God’s love really is simple. It’s huge, it’s unconditional, it’s free. It’s ours for the receiving, if we will but just believe. Paul prayed that we would

…[be] rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height-- to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. Ephesians 3:18-19

And while I believe it is impossible to fully understand, grasp and know the love of God in its entirety, I do believe it is possible to understand it as much as we are humanly capable. We define the ceiling of that understanding by what we choose to believe about God, about His love, and about ourselves.

“What a good earthly father would not do, God who is our Father would not do either; and what a good father ought to do, God who is our Father is absolutely sure to do.” ~ Hannah Whitall Smith

We Do It Our Way: Embracing Our Homeschool Style

2011-07-05T13:28:00.001-04:00

Are you struggling in your homeschool? Maybe you're trying to put the square peg in the round hole...

I have finally come to grips with the fact that we are, indeed, unschoolers. However, I have a passion for forms. I love charts, planning pages and the like, but truth be told, I end up either using them for a while then fizzling out or not using them at all. I have been pondering on whether or not I can truly consider myself to be an "unschooler" if I am using forms and charts and planning pages.

Why not?

Unschooling is not the absence of schooling. It is allowing your child the freedom to learn whatever captures their interest. Bats. Crystals. Snakes. Underwater basket weaving. All of these things have educational merits. You can teach math with bats (Suzy had 5 bats fly into her hair and 3 got stuck. How many bats are in Suzy's hair?), geometry with crystals, and physical education with underwater basket weaving (and snakes, if you find yourself needing to run away from some...). Actually, these things are more caught than taught. My kids prefer to learn by doing rather than by sitting and cranking out worksheets. They learn by seeing, feeling, hearing, moving and asking questions. I love that!

So, how do you keep records while unschooling? What about lesson plans?

Daily Lesson Plan: wake up, live life, learn something along the way

Yet, there does need to be some structure. Children also need discipline...left to their own devices, they are inherently foolish.

Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of correction will drive it far from him. Proverbs 22:15 (NKJV)

Intelligent children listen to their parents; foolish children do their own thing.Proverbs 13:1 (The Message)

Intelligent unschooling parents, then, will be watchful for what interests their children and be mindful to guide their studies. Just as guardrails on a road are not meant to restrict our driving fun but to keep us from danger so we can arrive at our destination safely, guidelines and discipline in the homeschool keep our children from their own inherent foolishness and keep them on the road to responsible, intelligent adulthood. And as parents, we need to be responsible...as homeschooling parents, we need to be responsible and accountable.

Our state does not require labor intensive record-keeping. Thank God for that! We are only required to keep an attendance record. However, I do believe it is foolish to not keep any records at all of what your children are learning simply because the state does not require it. Many well-meaning (and some not so well-meaning) but uninformed social service agents would view that as evidence of educational neglect. So, in the event of any questioning about your homeschool and whether you are actually teaching your children, you can alleviate any fears by showing that your children are, indeed, learning at the level in which they are capable.

So, what about those forms and charts and planning pages that I love to love, only to end up hating to use? How can I use them to keep us as disciplined as we need to be and as accountable as I should be?

The trick is to find forms, charts and planning pages that work with our family's style. That satisfy my need for writing things down, without confining me to someone else's idea of proper record keeping. After searching through tons of documents online...some really great forms and planning pages...I've come to realize that the trick, then, is to make my own...which, it just so happens, is one of my favorite hobbies.

And so, I have decided to make all of my own record keeping forms. I'll test-run them over the next few weeks...as learning doesn't end here because the public school system says school is out. It's more relaxed, more fun, but there is still learning going on.

Today, I created my first PDF of a form I think will finally suit my style. It's a Daily Learning Log sheet, with ample space to write in what we did and to check off the subject areas that are covered. I can easily see at a glance if we have balanced learning going on or are neglecting other areas and can adjust accordingly.

Visit my page on Homeschool Launch to download this Daily Learning Log (there is one with subjects already included, and one blank for your own personalization). I plan to incorporate this sheet in my DIY Homeschool Planner for the coming year. You can also find a TON of great forms for just about anything you need for your homeschool and homekeeping there.

Click here to check out my new unschooling planner! It's simple and flexible, and I think I'm going to love it!

Of course, this form may not suit your needs at all. That's ok...just find out what does. Then use it. You'll be a lot less frustrated and be much more successful at making learning fun, exciting and enticing for your children. How else can we raise up life-long learners?

SOAP Devotion: The Disciplined Mind

2011-06-27T09:23:00.000-04:00

After using the SOAP format for a few weeks, I've found that I really like it. Well enough to switch my devotional posts over to a collaborative blog I'm doing with a dear friend of mine, where we are both searching for God's pure, unadulterated Truth.

I've begun studying a book by Nancy Leigh DeMoss, Lies Women Believe and the Truth That Sets Them Free, along with the companion study Walking In The Truth. I'll be using the SOAP format to post what Truth God is revealing to me through this study. Today, I learned about having a disciplined mind.

So, grab a cup of coffee and head on over to A Cup of Truth and join us as we discover just what Truth is...

A Cup of Truth: The Disciplined Mind

Do you ever pay attention to your mind? Do you “take every thought captive”, as the Word admonishes? Or, are your thoughts running amok throughout the day? God doesn’t tell us to take our thoughts captive for no reason…we have an enemy bent on destroying us and all that we hold dear. [read more here...]

SOAP Devotion: 2 Kings 8

2011-06-22T07:50:00.000-04:00

If you are a Christ-follower, you probably want to be obedient to what God wants you to do, right? Of course, we all struggle with that spirit-led desire to truly follow Christ and our flesh’s desire to do whatever it wants. But what about when God tells us to do something that doesn’t seem to make sense? What about when He asks us to leave everything we know behind and go somewhere else? How quick are we to obey…and what are the consequences?

Today’s Reading is 2 Kings 8

Scripture: The woman acted at once and did as the man of God had said - she went with her household and stayed in the land of the P'lishtim for seven years. 2 Kings 8:2

Observation: The woman acted at once and did what God told her to do, through His servant. There was no questioning, no negotiating, no arguing…she just did what she was supposed to do. Later, everything she left behind was restored to her.

Application: Sometimes God asks us to do things that don’t make sense…although in the case of the woman in this passage, leaving the land where she was because a famine was on the horizon definitely makes sense. But she had to leave her home, lands, income – everything she had known. And it sounds like God left it up to her where to go, as Elisha told her to “Move away, you and your household, and stay wherever you can”(v. 1). The directive was simply to leave the land, with her household, because of the coming famine.

What is our response to God when He asks us, or tells us, to do something radical? Do we immediately obey or do we try to argue with God? Or negotiate? Maybe make some bargains…you know, “God, if You change Your mind on this, I promise I will (or will never do ______ again)…” Do we just decide not to do what God says and keep on going, pretending that we never heard what God said?

The woman immediately obeyed. She left everything and stayed gone for the seven years of the famine. What happened when she returned? A divine encounter! She came to the king to make a claim on her house and land which she had left behind. It just so happened that the king had just asked Elisha’s servant to tell him of the great things Elisha had done, and the servant was telling him about the woman whose dead son was brought back to life. She was that woman! And the king appointed a special officer and told him:

"Restore everything that belongs to her, including the income her fields have produced from the day she left them until now."

Did you catch that? Not only did he restore her home and land, but all the income she had lost out on for seven years! I don’t know how much that is…I imagine it was quite a bit, as she was a wealthy woman, but seven years’ income in a lump sum would be welcome in my home, that’s for sure! And she went to the king to make a claim on what was rightfully hers…not to beg for it to be returned.

God knew what was best for her and her household. He told her to leave and she quickly obeyed. What if she hadn’t? What if she had dragged her feet? Delayed obedience is still disobedience. What blessings would she have missed out on by doing that? What blessings do we miss out on because we do not immediately obey? If God has told us to go, and we stay, we have no right to complain about our circumstances. We had the chance to get out of the famine, but we chose to go our own way…and chose the consequences ourselves. We can’t blame God for that.

We can’t let fear rule our decision making. Even when something doesn’t seem to make sense, we must remember that God knows our end from our beginning. He knows what is coming down the road, regardless of whether or not we can see it. We have to trust that He has our best interest at heart, that He knows what is best for us and our family, and that He would never ask us to leave something behind without already having made provision for its restoration…and then some…in the future. When we need it. At just the right time. And we don’t have to beg for it…

Prayer: Father, you know what I am struggling with inside. I believe You have asked us to do something, and we have not done it. Partly out of fear, partly out of doubting our ability to hear You, but if we’re honest we’d probably say mostly because we just didn’t want to do it. There seems to be famine in the land, but we chose to stay in it. Forgive us for not quickly obeying! Help us overcome the fear and the willfulness of our own flesh. Help us to have confidence in our ability to hear You, so we can quickly obey without question. And Father, I thank You now for the provision You have ordained for us as we move forward in Your will.

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(blogger won't let me put in the graphic for some reason!)

SOAP Devotion: Daniel 1

2011-06-21T07:33:00.000-04:00

Recently, I heard a teaching on resolving your Yes’s and your No’s…saying yes to the things that encourage growth in your walk with the Lord and saying no to the things that hinder it. Daniel an excellent example of doing just that. It all starts with a choice…

Today’s Reading is Daniel 1

Scripture: But Dani'el resolved that he would not defile himself with the king's food or the wine he drank, so he asked the chief officer to be excused from defiling himself. Daniel 1:8

Observation: We live in a world that has set itself against God. It is up to us to choose to follow His ways or the world’s. We must purpose, or resolve, in our hearts to obey the ways of the Lord. And when we do, He blesses us and leads us through whatever comes our way.

Application: This message was good to hear. It’s making me think about what I purpose in my heart to do or not do. We were to make a Yes List (things that encourage growth and intimacy with the Lord) and a No List (things that hinder growth and intimacy) and honestly, I’m having a hard time coming up with a No List. Not that I’m so perfect I never do anything wrong…quite the contrary! But I’m not out there every day lying, stealing, cheating on my husband or killing people, so I have to really look at what I’m doing or not doing that hinders my walk with the Lord. It’s just not that obvious to me. Maybe it is to someone else…they have that unique advantage of being able to see what I don’t! But, there are “little foxes” that nibble on the vine and destroy it over time. It’s those little, subtle things that draw me away from God or get between Him and I that I need to diligently seek out and remove from my life.

The Yes List is so much easier…more prayer, more time in the word, more self-control, more grace for myself when I fail. I know that as I seek His heart, He will show me what needs to be on the No List…and then I have to make that choice. I have to be like Daniel and purpose in my heart to avoid those things no matter what others around me may think or say. God’s opinion of me is the one that matters first and the most. Daniel was blessed, promoted and prospered because he decided from the beginning that he would not do anything that would compromise his beliefs or go against God's ways.

Prayer: Father, show me what needs to be on that No List! What am I doing or not doing that gets in the way? What thought patterns and attitudes are hindering my ability to hear from you? What little foxes have gotten into my heart? Help me to always be able to resolve in my heart to follow you no matter what happens or what others think. Help me always to put You and Your ways first

SOAP Devotion: Isaiah 6

2011-06-15T09:36:00.000-04:00

Do you remember times in your life when you eagerly wished to be chosen for something? In school, you might have wanted to be picked for a sports team, a play, or just to be on the right side of the dodgeball game. As an adult, maybe you wanted to be picked for a job, to win a prize or some other exciting thing. And probably, there were others clamoring for the same thing. How many times can you remember being the only one saying “pick me!” Serving God isn’t always glamorous or easy, and often times the assignments can be difficult. But are you willing to say “pick me, Lord” when no one else is?

Today’s Reading Is Isaiah 6

Scripture: And I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, Whom shall I send, and who will go for us? Then I said, Here am I; send me. Isaiah 6:8

Observation: God is looking for those who are willing to go where He sends them. His call is to all who will hear and heed…am I listening? Am I willing to put up my hand and say “pick me, Lord!”?

Application: I can’t say I’m one of those people who is always out in the forefront…wanting to be noticed or picked for things. I like staying home in my nice little world and not being bothered by things around me. But that is not what God wants me to do…to cocoon myself away and not participate in the world. Sure, we are not to be “of this world”, but that doesn’t mean we aren’t to be in it. Aren’t we urged to be salt and light in the world? Salt doesn’t do much tucked away in the cupboard, and a light hidden in a closet isn’t being used to its full potential, either.

As I read this passage this morning, I was convicted of my selfish desire to shelter those I love and also be sheltered myself from all the evils of the world. I’m certainly not advocating throwing caution and wisdom out of the window…there is definitely a need for that, especially when it comes to young children. But do I make myself available to go where God says to go and do what He says to do? Do I talk to a stranger or offer to pray with someone I don’t know very well, or am I afraid to step out of my comfortable little zone? I have something amazing and wonderful – a life redeemed and restored by a loving Heavenly Father – that is meant to be shared with others, not hidden away for just myself.

I think there are a lot of believers out there who are right where I am. But who among us will be willing to lift our hand and say, like Isaiah, “Here I am, Lord…send me”? If we wait for others to do it, chances are it won’t get done…at least not near as quickly as if there are many willing hands to do the job. Will I have the courage to raise my hand…and really mean it? Will I have the quiet spirit and mind that I need to hear the invitation and the instruction? Only if I purposely quiet my spirit and mind and actively listen to what the Father is saying to me each day. Then I must choose to be chosen, regardless of the cost.

Prayer: Father, forgive me for selfishly hiding the wonderful gift you’ve given me! Help me to overcome my fears, give me boldness to share what You’ve blessed me with with others. Help me to be willing to say “pick me”, no matter what the cost. And please, help me have the quiet, receptive mind and spirit I need to hear You every moment of every day.

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SOAP Devotion: 1 Corinthians 3

2011-06-14T10:57:00.000-04:00

What kind of materials are we using as we build on the foundations laid in people’s lives? What kind of foundation have we laid in our children’s lives? Every word, every action is like a brick, a 2 x 4, a nail…all building and shaping who our children become. I know I’m only “supposed” to use one verse, but these two need to go together, so I’m cheating a little bit…

Today’s reading is 1 Corinthians 3

Scripture: Some will use gold, silver or precious stones in building on this foundation; while others will use wood, grass or straw. 13 But each one's work will be shown for what it is; the Day will disclose it, because it will be revealed by fire - the fire will test the quality of each one's work. 1 Corinthians 3:12-13

Observation: Everything we do or say influences and builds on another’s foundation. From the moment our children are born, we are laying a foundation and building upon it. What materials will we use? Anything made of wood, grass or straw will burn up and not last, and it will not make the structure stronger, but weaker. The same is true for me…others have built on the foundation of my life. What is wood, grass or straw…what is gold, silver and precious stones?

Application: As I read this, I thought of both what I’ve used to build in my children’s lives and what has been used to build in my own life growing up. It hasn’t all been gold, silver and precious stones. There is comfort in knowing that it will be burned up at some point…but that seems like such a waste. Can it be removed and replaced with gold, silver and precious stones that will not be burned away?

Buildings can be restored. It can take a long time and a lot of work, but it can be done. Repairing mistakes and damage before the building is finished seems like it would be much easier than after the building is done…after it has aged and weathered and settled.

Following the blueprints and directions will ensure the building is built soundly and correctly. Even when the ground shakes, the building can stand. But when the building is built haphazardly, not to code, and with substandard materials…even the smallest shaking or adverse conditions can cause the building to be damaged or be destroyed.

God’s Word and Holy Spirit are the blueprints and directions we are to follow when raising our children. The gold, silver and precious stones we are to use are all of the good things of God – love, joy, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, self-control – that shape and build their hearts, minds, souls and character into the people that He has designed them to be.

While we can’t control what others do, and unfortunately there will be “non-union” workers who show up on the job, we do have control over what we choose to do and say and where we allow our children to be. As they get older, we have to let them go a little bit…and trust that the foundation we laid and have built upon is strong and sturdy.

God allows us to build as we wish…but we then have to accept the consequences, and pay the price, for not following the directions. I’m so glad that he is not like some earthly bosses who will fire you for making mistakes…His grace is abundant and mercy unceasing. But I have to remember it’s not just me that is affected here…my children are, and potentially my grandchildren. I must be purposeful in my parenting, and must strive to always follow the blueprints and the directions while building upon my children’s hearts, minds and souls.

Prayer: Father, I so wish I wasn’t just “getting” this concept now. My precious daughter, whom You used to turn me back to You, is now almost 11 years old. 11 years of not always following the blueprint for her life. 11 years of not always seeking Your direction in how to parent her. I know I have used some wood, grass and straw to build in her life…please help me find it and remove it so it can be replaced with what is truly valuable and lasting. And my son, too…even he, in his short 3 years, has had some substandard material added to his foundation. Forgive me, Lord, for not always taking seriously this job before me…for letting my own wants and desires cause me to use anything but precious metals and stones to build in their lives. Help me to restore what has not been done correctly so that they are standing upon a strong, solid, and impermeable foundation. And Lord...help me remove in me what was laid there by others that doesn't belong and weakens this temple of yours. Replace it with what it good, pure and true and will last for eternity.

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SOAP Devotion: Romans 3

2011-06-13T10:28:00.000-04:00

Ever have one of those mornings (or whenever you have your quiet devotional time) where you just can’t seem to focus on what you’re reading? As I asked the Lord what to read today, one verse kept running through my head…I couldn’t remember where it was exactly, but knew it was in Romans. I thought Romans 8, and read that…but that wasn’t it. So I looked up the verse and it was Romans 3…I had to struggle to stay focused this morning…perhaps it’s the Pharisee in me that didn’t want to hear truth today…

Today's reading is Romans 3

Scripture: For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. Romans 3:23

Observation: There is no one above sin, not me or anyone else. I should not hold another to a higher standard than I hold for myself.

Application: It’s so easy to judge others. I know the Bible says, and unbelievers are quite quick to point out, “judge not, lest ye be judged”, but still, it’s human nature to point out the flaws in others while ignoring the same, and sometimes even worse, flaws in ourselves. It is completely wrong to expect someone to live up to standards that we ourselves can’t…or won’t…live up to…and yet, we still do just that.

I try to keep in mind that God is working on everyone, not just me. Everyone in the world is in varying stages of the process of perfection…from completely raw material (the unbeliever) to an almost polished gem (a precious saint moments away from finally seeing glory). What's harder to do, however, is to remember that I often struggle with the same sins and flaws as the person who’s character I am critiquing.

ALL have sinned…even me…and fall short of the glory of God…even me. If I can remember that, will it be easier to find grace for those in my life who are difficult to deal with? I struggle with that fine line between grace and enabling. It’s not always so clear. That is where I just simply must be able to hear the Father’s voice, directing me in what to say and do in order to best help a person. Being too harsh isn’t any more helpful than being too lenient…there just has to be balance. God has to be in the equation to balance things out.

Prayer: Father, thank You for Your grace and mercy…even though I sin and sin again. Help me to be able to show the same tender love, grace and mercy to others. Help me to not condemn another for a sin I also commit…help me to have compassion, to hear Your voice directing my words and actions. Help me to remember to allow You into the equation in order to find balance…for You cancel out the negatives in me and add the positives that are lacking. Thank You for what You have already done in my heart and mind toward those who have, in the past, been hurtful. Thank You for helping me see that You are diligently working in their lives too.

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SOAP Devotion: Proverbs 12

2011-06-09T11:40:00.000-04:00

Do you ever get angry? I mean really, explosively angry? It is such an out-of-control feeling! And far too often, others get hurt because we are out of control.

This morning, I went back to bed after seeing my honey off to work...the little girl I babysit wasn't coming until 9:00, it was rainy and dreary and just perfect for sleeping in. I should have stayed up and had my devotion time...that helps so much when it comes to controlling anger...to be plugged in and connected with God's grace for the day. And when that sippy cup fell onto my toe - good grief, who knew a half-empty sippy cup could feel like a boulder when it hits your toe - I had a hard time not exploding. Only a few weeks ago, I probably would have...but feeling better makes it easier to keep those emotions in check. Still, I knew I needed to get connected with God before the rest of the day happened...and happened badly.

Proverbs 12 is full of great advice. Diligence and laziness, righteousness and wickedness, the wise and the foolish. I can’t say I’m surprised at what God brought to my attention this morning…and since I am wise, I will love correction and follow this excellent advice regarding anger…

Today’s Reading is Proverbs 12.

Scripture: A fool's anger is known at once, but a cautious person slighted conceals his feelings. Proverbs 12:16

Observation: There are a good many angry fools in society today. Restraining one’s emotions requires maturity and wisdom, and a cautious person is one who can keep their emotions in check, even when slighted.

Application: I’ve had issues with anger for many years. Thankfully, God has worked on that wrinkle in my character faithfully and steadily. As I have matured, it has become easier to not get carried away by my emotions and blow up like a volcano whenever something makes me angry or when I feel that my “rights” have been violated. Isn’t that what we feel when we’re slighted by someone?

A fool immediately reacts to a situation, and lets himself get carried away by his feelings. Things get said that hurt others. Things sometimes get broken. And many times, others can get physically hurt. They are only thinking of themselves and their own feelings, not at all of the other person...except maybe of hurting them in retaliation. It is selfish an immature. Ouch, God...that one really hurts.

A wise person is cautious…he considers possible responses to a situation before opening his mouth. He knows the power of words to hurt or to heal, and chooses to not use hurtful words. He is cautious, because he knows that how he responds to the situation can either defuse it or ignite it further.

I have to admit that I’m not always wise. Some of that has been because of health issues…and while I’m not trying to use that as an excuse, it is difficult sometimes when you feel terrible or your hormones are all wacked out, to retain a grip on wisdom and prudence. I look back at some of the things that have made me explode, and really…how ridiculous I was to allow such a little thing have so much control over ME. I am in charge of myself, not some fickle and childish emotion.

And when I see the influence my anger has had on my children, I just want to cry. I know God has forgiven me every time I blow it and repent…but I have a hard time forgiving myself. Especially when little arms have hugged my neck and precious voices say “I ‘give you, Mommy.” They shouldn’t have to say that…but I am glad that God uses even my sin to bring about Christlikeness in my children. They forgive so easily, without even a second thought…they have such sweet and tender hearts.

I long to be that quiet, peaceful, and humble-spirited wife and mother…but it just doesn’t seem to be in me some days. Ok, most days, to be honest. I know that God created me to be that way, He just has a lot of hard rock to chisel away before it can be revealed, I guess.

Prayer: Father, forgive me again for allowing my emotions to rule my behavior. Help me to be wise and cautious…to always RESPOND instead of REACT to every situation. Help me to be a peacemaker in my home, and to model a quiet spirit. Show me the root of my anger, and rip it out completely…I don’t want it in me! Help me, today, Lord, to be peaceful and gentle.

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SOAP Devotion: Esther 1

2011-06-08T08:53:00.000-04:00

When God said read the first chapter of Esther, I thought I knew where He was going. I know the story of Queen Esther and how she saved her people by entreating the king. But that’s not the queen God was speaking to me about today at all. There’s another queen in that story…Queen Vashti. And she wasn’t nearly as noble as Esther…

Today’s Reading is Esther 1

Scripture: because this act of the queen's will become known to all the women, who will then start showing disrespect toward their own husbands…Esther 1:17a

Observation: What women do we, knowingly or unknowingly, idolize on TV? How do they influence our behavior as wives and the queens of our homes? Are we aware of how our own behavior influences our daughters, friends or neighbors?

Application: Queen Vashti dis’ed her husband, the king, when he commanded her to come and she refused. This, of course, really made the king mad and he consulted with his sages on how to deal with this impertinent queen. The sages wisely reasoned that the queen’s public display of disrespect and willful disobedience to the authority of the king would influence the women of the kingdom to also disrespect their husbands.

As I read this chapter today, that verse just really grabbed my attention. It reminded me of a show I used to watch fairly regularly just a few years ago – King of Queens. I always thought it was pretty funny, what with that spunky Carrie Heffernan and her goofy husband Doug and all. I don’t know why, but I quit watching it regularly. But the next time I watched an episode, I was really shocked by how disrespectful and nasty the character of Carrie was…and that I didn’t notice it before when I watched it all the time.

How often do we idolize the women we see on TV, who are nearly always portrayed as smart, sexy, funny, ambitious and successful (while their male counterparts are typecast as bumbling idiots)? There is nothing wrong, of course, with being smart, sexy, funny, ambitious and successful…but these women also are never, or rarely if ever, shown to be respectful to their husbands…and certainly never submissive. Are we influenced by these women? How does their influence on the young and impressionable minds of our daughters shape the women they will become?

My husband told me he never liked that show, though we used to watch it often. He also told me he didn’t like Everyone Loves Raymond, another show I used to like watching…until my eyes were opened to the subtle way the entertainment industry is helping to destroy the sacred institutions of marriage and family. Our daughters are growing up believing that men are stupid, incapable morons. Our sons are growing up believing they are stupid, incapable morons who can’t do anything right, so why bother trying to be a father, to lead a family? Besides, it’s the women who wear the pants in the family, because they are the ones who are smart and capable. It is so easy to become immersed and immune to the influence of what comes out of that stupid box…it took not watching it for me to see what I was unable to see before.

As queens of our homes, we wield powerful influence in the lives of our children. Our behavior is often noticed more than our words. Biblical submission to authority and to our husbands is not being a doormat, but rather respecting the authority God has placed over us. It is not never having a say in an issue, but allowing our husbands to make the final decision, because that is the responsibility God has given him as the leader of his home and family. Our daughters learn how to be wives and mothers from us. Our sons learn what a wife and mother should be from us. As followers of Christ, then, we should strive to submit to our husbands and model for our children God’s perfect plan for the family.

Prayer: Lord, thank you for helping me to understand what submission really means. I can see, as I have learned to be more submissive to my husband, that there is peace and freedom in that submission that is not there when I try to wear my husband’s pants. Help me always to remember how I influence my children’s view of marriage and family by my own behavior and help me be the perfect example of a godly wife and mother. Forgive me for the times that I have been disrespectful or not submissive to my husband’s authority, which you have given him over me. Help me also to remember that how I conduct myself as a wife is seen by my friends and others…let me not sow discord by my behavior or by grumbling and complaining about my husband. Let all of my words about my husband be loving and respectful.

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SOAP Devotion: Psalm 52

2011-06-07T08:37:00.000-04:00

Gossip? Really? That is what You want to talk to me about this morning? Surely I’m getting a mixed- up signal here…that can’t be what You want to speak to me about…can it?

So, this time it really was Psalm 52 I was supposed to read. I tried to find a way around it…as I didn’t like this one either. Conviction has a way of making you feel uncomfortable when facing truths about yourself you’d rather not acknowledge. But I am thankful for God’s great mercy that is new this morning, and every morning.

Today’s Reading is Psalm 52

Scripture: Your tongue, as sharp as a razor, plots destruction and works deception. Psalm 52:2

Observation: The tongue, when left to run amok, cuts and destroys…deception is its favored medium.

Application: As I read this passage, my first thought was toward a certain person in my life that has been a thorn in my side for years. This person has used their razor-sharp tongue to plot destruction and work in deception against me many times. Then I immediately am reminded that when we hear a message and think of someone else first “who really needs to hear it”, we should also examine our own hearts to see if we need to hear it as well. Have I done the same toward that person? Then I asked the Lord what in the world was He trying to tell me…and I hear that G-word whispered gently into my mind. Gossip. Have I been involved in gossip?

So, what is gossip? If you’re going to avoid something, you need to know what it is. I’m sure just about anyone would recognize that someone coming to you and saying “Did you hear about So-And-So? She…”, especially when that someone didn’t like So-And-So, was bringing some juicy gossip to them. Galilean Pastors has a nice study on gossip here. Studying Joseph, who rejected the advances of Potiphar’s wife, we can learn a lot about the destructive force of the tongue:

Mrs. Potiphar devised a malicious lie fueled by anger, jealousy, bitterness, and resentment because of rejection. She didn’t get what she wanted so she made up a lie, spreading it throughout her household servants (gossip) so her lie could be confirmed, even though none were there when it happened, they only had gossip to rely on. Because of this chain of events Mrs. Potiphar set out to use the most powerful and damaging weapon of all--the tongue--to destroy Joseph's unblemished reputation and character, especially to Potiphar. As expected, Potiphar became outraged, so much so that he had Joseph, his personal and trusted attendant, thrown in prison.

Joseph’s spotless reputation and character was stolen by gossip (the gossip of Mrs. Potiphar and her servants). Now, not only were they (Mrs. Potiphar and the other servants) gossips but they were thieves as well. Joseph had some decisions to make, was he going to be faithful and obedient to God or was he going to become angry and vindictive doing the very thing that had been done to him. Joseph chose obedience in honoring God and, because of that, God’s favor went with Joseph and stayed upon him; even in prison, gaining the favor of the prison warden. (Gen 39:21-23)

When we gossip, or even participate in gossip, we are actively and voluntarily engaging in a destructive purpose, character assassination and theft. Basically, gossip is a destructive need for personal gratification, making one’s self feel good about one’s self by destroying the character and reputation of another.

You see “misery loves company.” Some people cannot stand the thought of someone else succeeding, whether spiritually, physically, or financially; so they search for reasons to accuse and discredit the person, ministry, business, etc. to make themselves feel better about who they are.

But can gossip be even just plainly discussing facts about someone else? Facts that are unfavorable, yet still the gospel truth? And not brought up out of a malicious heart and spirit?

Gossip can also be defined as “…often half-truths and even truth that does not need to be said.”

Truth that does not need to be said. That is the one that trips me up. I can easily recognize and restrain myself from telling half-truths and outright lies, but many times see no problem with telling something that is the truth. And, let's face it...some people are just a well-spring of unfavorable truth, thanks to their own choices, but that doesn't mean we need to spread that information around. It’s been often said “if you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem” and I think that is an apt description of gossip as well. Does what you are telling someone else, even if true, help the other person? Most likely not, if we’re going to be brutally honest about it.

I can honestly say that Psalm 52:2 does not describe me…at least not anymore. I admit to operating in that manner years ago, when I was much younger and immature, both chronologically and spiritually. But I can’t say I never gossip, unfortunately. The majority of the time it is completely unintentional, it just happens…you don’t even realize what you’re doing until you’re in too deep. But there are occasions where the intent of my heart is not honorable when I talk about someone. Well, to be honest, it’s always that thorn in my side…never my friends…so friends, take heart and know that I’m not gossiping about you!

Even as I write this, I’m thinking I should change the wording in a few areas, so as not to be obvious about whom I am referring to. If you know me, and my life, at all…well, you don’t have to be a rocket scientist to figure that out. But this illustration is not meant at all in that manner…it is a practical illustration of something many people struggle with. We all have people in our lives that are difficult to deal with, it’s how we handle those situations, and the temptation to gossip about them, that either glorifies Christ and brings blessing to those who persecute us or fuels the destructive, raging fire of the tongue…which is truly an unruly evil that can not be tamed. It can only be brought under submission to Christ, and that takes a very concerted and determined effort.

Prayer: Father, forgive me for participating in gossip against those who hurt and persecute me. Help me to recognize gossip for what it is immediately…and give me the grace I need to say “I’m not going to gossip about this person” instead of revealing what I know, even if it is true. Help me to bless those who persecute and spitefully use me and only speak words of life and blessing about everyone. Thank You for forgiving me…thank You that Your mercy is new every morning.

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SOAP Devotion: You Love Me Anyway

2011-06-06T07:58:00.000-04:00

I’ve had this song in my head for several days now by Sidewalk Prophets. I love this song…(sorry…can’t embed the video, but please click on the title to check it out on youtube…). Not sure how I will fit this in SOAP format, but I’m going to give it a try anyway…

You Love Me Anyway

The question was raised
As my conscience fell
A silly, little lie
It didn’t mean much
But it lingers still
In the corners of my mind
Still you call me to walk
On the edge of this world
To spread my dreams and fly
But the future’s so far
My heart is so frail
I think I’d rather stay inside
But You love me anyway
It’s like nothing in life that I’ve ever known

You love me anyway
Oh Lord, how You love me
How You love me

It took more than my strength
To simply be still
To seek but never find
All the reasons we change
The reasons I doubt
And why do loved ones have to die?

But You love me anyway
It’s like nothing in life that I’ve ever known
You love me anyway
Oh Lord, how You love me

I am the thorn in Your crown
But You love me anyway
I am the sweat from Your brow
But You love me anyway
I am the nail in Your wrist
But You love me anyway
I am Judas’ kiss
But You love me anyway

See now, I am the man that called out from the crowd
For Your blood to be spilled on this earth shaking ground
Yes then, I turned away with this smile on my face
With this sin in my heart tried to bury Your grace
And then alone in the night, I still called out for You
So ashamed of my life, my life, my life

But You love me anyway
Oh, God… how you love me
You love me anyway
It’s like nothing in life that I’ve ever known
You love me anyway
Oh Lord, how You love me
You love me, You love me
You love me, You love me
How You love me
How You love me
How You love me

Scripture: “For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8: 38-39

Observation: There is nothing I can do or say that will ever make God not love me…or my enemies…and as a believer, nothing can separate me from God’s love.

Application: This past Saturday as I was out picking up the final few things for James’ graduation open house, this song was going through my head. Of course, I can not usually remember all of the lyrics to a song, just part of them…and those parts go through my head over and over and over…and this time was no exception. All of a sudden, I was just overcome with emotion at this bit of the song:

The realization that I was the thorn in His crown…the sweat that dripped from His brow…the nail in His wrist…and that kiss of betrayal just completely derailed me. Obviously, I wasn’t there to actually slam that crown of thorns into Head or hammer that nail into His wrist…and oh I surely like to think that if I was, I wouldn’t have been one of the people in the crowd demanding His blood be spilled…but it is because of me, because God made provision for my sin long before I, or any of my ancestors, were ever even thought of, that He endured the injustice of the Cross. For me. Simply because He loves me.

Even when I turned my back on Him…He still loved me anyway.

Even when I denied Him…He still loved me anyway.

Even when I did every wicked thing I could, purely for the “fun” of it and to rebel against God and all authority…He still loved me anyway.

Even now, when I am too busy to spend time with Him…He still loves me anyway.

And He still loves the people in my life who are hard to love, who have hurt me, lied to and about me, shamelessly persecuted and used me, and turned those I love against me…He still loves them, and calls me to love them as well.

What form does that kind of love take? Do you become a doormat and let someone walk all over you “in the name of love”? Certainly not. Do you put on a fake smile and engage in polite conversation? I don’t think so…a “fake” smile is not genuine, so how could that be love? Do you keep putting yourself out there, vulnerable, to be burned again and again? I don’t think that’s what God means by loving someone who persecutes and spitefully uses you, either. He says be wise as serpents and gentle as doves.

God is still teaching me about loving my enemies. He set the greatest example, and on my own I can never follow it. I need His help to even make an attempt at it here on earth. I will fail, most likely, from time to time. It’s a process…one step forward…two steps back…more or less. Right now, love manifests as indifference…but that is still better than returning evil for evil, so there is progress. God’s wisdom tells me that the stove is still hot, don’t touch it again…and I won’t. But should it ever cool and He says “Reach out” again, I have a choice to make…and I hope I can choose to obey.

Prayer: Abba Father…you loved me before I was ever born…You knew how I would betray You…deny You…and set myself against You, and yet Your love for me never faltered. You also knew how my enemies would hurt me and persecute me, and yet You still love them as well. You know I desire to be obedient…to walk in the Way of Your precious Son…and You know I am weak. Please help me to love those who are hard to love, even the ones who have hurt me. Give me wisdom to know how to show Your love to them. Forgive me for the times that I have not walked in love and have been just as unlovable as my enemies. Thank You for loving me no matter what…even in my most unlovable moments…

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The Miracle Pill (Updated 8-3-11)

2011-06-05T19:08:00.000-04:00

Have you ever wished you could just take a pill and everything would be all better? It’s hard to believe that it could be that simple, but for me…well, I think I really have found a “miracle pill.” You don’t really know how bad you feel until you suddenly feel good. I mean really, really good. And you actually feel like living, not just surviving, each day. Let me introduce you to my new friend, Levothyroxine…

I have suspected for years that my thyroid was low, but any time it was tested, the result was always the same – normal. There’s a family history of low thyroid, so it seemed reasonable that the tiredness and fatigue, memory problems, irritability, increasing intolerance to cold, inability to focus and thinning hair just might be related to a hormonal imbalance such as low thyroid. But, if the test result is normal, then that can’t be the problem, right?

Wrong. I learned while researching thyroid problems that there is a grey area in the “normal” range…the higher the number on a TSH test, the lower your thyroid level is, so the closer you get to the upper limit of the normal range, the more likely you are to have symptoms of hypothyroidism. And when your numbers are at the high end of normal and you’re presenting with symptoms like those I listed above, they call that subclinical hypothyroidism. I discovered that while reading the book, The Thyroid Solution: A Revolutionary Mind-Body Program That Will Help You by Arem Ridha. I really felt empowered, after reading this book, to discuss my concerns with my doctor. I also feel fortunate that my doctor was willing to examine the possibility, as many doctors won’t even consider treatment for low thyroid if your test is “normal.”

Did you see that picture up there of the two tiny orange pills? Those are my “miracle pills”. I started taking the lowest dose there is, and a week later it felt like someone flipped a switch on in my head. For the first time in years - I’d say possibly for the first time in my adult life, and particularly in the last three years since having my son – I can think straight, concentrate, and focus. I have an energy level I have never, ever had as long as I can remember, which is great because I actually WANT to do things! I even physically move faster.I don’t feel like I’m wandering around in a fog anymore. In fact, I did more housework, cleaning, decluttering and organizing in four days than I’ve done in the last six months combined..or more! It’s simply amazing…one little bitty pill has completely changed my life.

Now, if the doctor had just prescribed the Levothyroxine three months ago like I wanted to begin with, I’d have had three months of feeling good, and losing weight, under my belt…kind of makes me mad when I think about all the years I’ve spent feeling like poo and beating myself up because I just couldn’t “get it together”.

Even though Levothyroxine is my “miracle pill”, I can’t forget that I have years of bad habits to overcome. I think it will be easier now that my brain is no longer a bowl of rice pudding, however. Because feeling good just feels amazing…especially when you realize just how bad you were feeling.

***UPDATE***

After taking levothyroxine for several weeks, I began to notice a gradual decline in energy level and motivation...returning almost to where I was before I started taking it, only I could still think more clearly. I called my doctor and we did blood tests again, the TSH test and A1C. I mentioned what I had found about metformin possibly causing thyroid levels to decrease but the nurse said "No, it doesn't do that." I find this interesting, because it was just like when I started taking metformin to begin with...initially I felt better (getting my blood sugar under control, I'm sure, was the factor there) but then after 4 to 6 weeks or so, I began to once again become lethargic and completely unmotivated and the mental fog began to increase again, after having subsided noticeably. The same thing happened here when I started taking the levothyroxine...and guess what? At the same time I started taking that, she increased the dose of metformin I was taking. A coinicidence? Maybe...but I have my doubts. What I had read about the connection between metformin and lower thyroid levels was, of course, theory and more study is needed but it seems to me, in my case anyway, that there may be a connection.

My thyroid test showed a slight increase in thyroid hormone, which of course would account for the overall improvement in how I'm feeling, but since I'm still experiencing symptoms she went ahead and increased my dose. While I don't have that same level of energy I had when I first started taking it, over all, I feel better and hope this increase in dose will do it. At least she was happy with my A1C reading and didn't increase that dreadful metformin. I can't wait to get off of that!

SOAP Devotion: Psalm 15

2011-06-02T08:07:00.000-04:00

Honestly, when I asked God what to read today, I heard “Psalm fiftee…and knew He was saying Psalm 15, but I remember what that Psalm is and I guess didn’t want to read it (again!) so I think I changed it to Psalm Fiftee-two…I do that sometimes…I know what God is saying but I don’t want to hear it so I change it to something else. Not a good practice, really. It’s the human in me, I guess. But, after reading Psalm 52, I knew that just wasn’t it and I had interjected my own thoughts into the answer so I read Psalm 15. Again. Have you read Psalm 15? If so, can you see why I avoid it? God brings me back to this passage repeatedly…He must be trying to tell me something…

Today’s reading is Psalm 15

Scripture: Those who live a blameless life, who behave uprightly, who speak truth from their hearts… Psalm 15:2

Observation: Who can live in Your tabernacle…who can live on Your holy mountain? Who can abide in Your Presence? Those who live blamelessly…uprightly…truthfully…

Application: Um…so doesn’t that mean no one can live there? Who really lives blamelessly? Is it the all-or-nothing-ness of the way my mind works that makes me think that blameless means perfect…no sin, no mistakes. Not humanly possible!! Isn’t this completely unfair?

The Strong’s entry for “uprightly”:

from <H8552> (tamam); entire (literal, figurative or moral); also (as noun) integrity, truth :- without blemish, complete, full, perfect, sincerely (-ity), sound, without spot, undefiled, upright (-ly), whole.

—Strong's Talking Greek & Hebrew Dictionary

There it is…just as I suspected…“perfect”. But also, a glimmer of hope, as “sincere” is listed there. I know, and so does God, that perfect is impossible in this life. He also knows my heart, and that I sincerely want to “get it right.” Thankfully, His Son is my strength! Through Christ, I can do all things…even those that seem impossible. And because of His great mercy, there is forgiveness when I blow it.

I think that’s why I have not wanted to read this Psalm. It just seemed like an impossible standard…one more thing for me to use to beat myself up for not “measuring up”. I will never, in this body…in this life on earth…measure up to Christ, but it is still the goal for which I strive. To love others as He did. To walk in truth. To be so connected to the Father that everything I do and say is only what the Father does and says.

Lofty goals, to be sure. Unattainable, impossible…on my own. God always has a way of reminding me that apart from Him, I can do nothing. That I need Him as much as I need air, water and food.

Prayer: Abba Father…thank you for finally helping me to overcome the dread at reading this passage. Thank You for helping me to see that it isn’t meant to belittle or demean me, but to encourage me to keep reaching for that goal of perfection in Christ. Thank You for Your great and tender mercy that you lavishly pour out when I blow it and seek your forgiveness…the one thing I always find when I look for it! Thank You that today, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

SOAP Devotion: Isaiah 25

2011-06-01T07:45:00.000-04:00

This morning, I woke up with a song in my head…well, part of one anyway. The lyrics went “Oh death/where is your sting?” I knew that was from a verse in the Bible, so that was where I decided to read today…only reading 1 Corinthians 15 was like reading Fundamentals of Actuarial Practice…dry and not exciting in the least. God!! Your word is alive, so why does this seem so dead? I read it again…all 58 verses…and again…and this time, it occurred to me that perhaps I was reading the wrong passage. It makes reference to a verse in the Old Testament – Isaiah 25:8 – so off to Isaiah 25 I went, and it was like jumping into a sparkling pool on a hot summer’s day…refreshing and vibrant!

Today’s Reading is Isaiah 25

Scripture: He will swallow up death forever. Adonai ELOHIM will wipe away the tears from every face, and he will remove from all the earth the disgrace his people suffer. For ADONAI has spoken. Isaiah 25:8

Observation: Adonai ELOHIM is my defender, my protector, my comforter, my provider…He vindicates, He lavishly pours out grace and blessings. And one day soon, death will be put in its place.

Application: It was hard to just choose one verse to focus on this time. Sometimes, a verse will just “pop out” to me as I read…almost like the Holy Spirit grabs ahold of me and gives me a little shake…or a big one, depending on what circumstances are whirling around in my life at the time. This whole passage spoke to me about how my Abba Father is always there to defend me, to protect me, to destroy my enemies and vindicate me. He also comforts me and lavishes His grace and mercy on me. And the promise to hold on to here is that one day, death will be “swallowed up”…there will be no more death, no more tears, no more disgrace for His people.

As I face difficult situations…difficult people…and difficulties in general, I know that He is always there with me…a strong tower to run to in time of need. A strong pair of arms to hold me and comfort me. And gentle, loving hands that extravagantly place before me a feast of rich food and wine – His word, His Spirit – to nourish and bless me.

Prayer: Daddy, thank You for always being there when I need You…and even when I think I don’t. I’m so glad You’ve got my back! You know what lies ahead for me, what difficulties I will face each coming day, and You’ve already prepared all that I will need to get through each situation. I long for the day when death will be swallowed up forever, for the day when disgrace is not a word in my vocabulary or anyone else’s, because you have restored honor and dignity. Help me to grab hold of all You’ve laid out on Your beautiful banquet table for me today.

SOAP Devotion: Psalm 42

2011-05-31T07:59:00.000-04:00

What is SOAP? Click on the logo above to learn more about it!

My quick answer is…it’s a new tool for me to use to help me with regular devotional time. I’ve done well in the past with having regular devotional time, but have “fallen off the wagon” yet again. I want to have a firmly established routine of regular time spent with God in His word…but I’m also a homeschooling mother with a very busy three year old, so it’s not like I can just spend as much time as I want every day lounging at the feet of Jesus, much as I would like to do just that. Even though I’m not a big fan of timers or saying “OK God, I can give you 20 minutes today…” I have to be realistic about the season of life in which I find myself at the moment. In a Mary day, there has to be some Martha moments…

Today’s Reading is Psalm 42

Scripture: By day ADONAI commands his grace, and at night his song is with me as a prayer to the God of my life. Psalm 42:8

Observation: God is with me day and night, not one second of any day is He not there beside me. He commands His grace in my life and places a song within me, a unique and precious song for me to sing back to Him…a prayer only He and I share.

Application: The title of this Psalm in my bible is Yearning for God in the Midst of Distresses. How appropriate for me right now! While it’s not the typical external shaking I’m used to, but rather an internal sifting and shaking, it is still distressing. I still yearn for God’s presence, because I don’t always feel Him near me. Sometimes I feel alone. Sometimes I feel abandoned. Sometimes I feel like my son must feel when he wants something and I’m busy doing dishes…or wasting time on Facebook…like I’m bothering Him with my requests.

But, God is always there, even when I don’t feel like He is. Day and night, He is with me…He is watching over every nanosecond of my day, He is guarding me as I sleep…He sings over me…a special song that only He knows. I can know this song too, He longs to share it with me…it is a love song between my Lord and I…if only I will quiet my soul, my mind, and listen. And when I sing this song back to Him, it touches His heart and He moves in my life and on my behalf. He commands his grace…and it must obey His voice. I must also obey…and obedience brings blessing!

Prayer: Adonai…help me to quiet my soul and my mind! Help me to set aside those thoughts and feelings that distract me from your presence, that interfere with hearing your sweet and precious voice. I want to hear your song each day…I want to sing it back to you, as a prayer of devotion and love, of praise and wonder for who You are. I want to be a blessing to those around me…help me to be obedient so your blessings will flow through me and touch everyone I come in contact with…even those who are hard to love. Help me to hear Your voice only, and not my own, which will tell me that someone may not deserve your grace. In truth, no one “deserves” your grace, including myself…and yet, You pour it out on us anyway, because You love us. Thank You, for loving me so very much.

If You Fail to Plan, You Plan to Fail

2011-05-14T23:56:00.000-04:00

Schedules and plans and routines - oh my - three words that are not essential parts of my vocabulary! What about you? I know many people plan, have set routines and schedules, but I never seem to be able to pull it off...at least not for any length of time. They say it takes 21 days for a habit to form. If I can just stick with a "plan" or a "system" for 21 days, then maybe it will stick! The problem is, I don't know how to make myself stick with the program.

I had a supervisor at a job once who helped me see, somewhat, what my trouble with time is: for me, time is fluid, not concrete. I don't see time in little blocks that can be stacked or lined up and rearranged at will, but rather as a large, constantly moving mass that is just all over everywhere at any given moment. Multi-tasking is not my strong suit, really. For example, as I type this right now I am burning a pancake. Why? Because I was checking some blogs while my sourdough pancakes were cooking and came across this great post at Graceful Abandon about 21-Day Meal Planning. Which inspired me to blog about time, planning, and schedules. And the next thing I know, I turn around and notice the burners under my skillets are still on...and I had a foggy notion about cooking something...OH NO!! MY PANCAKES!! Seriously...I may need some medication...

Fluid is dynamic. It is powerful. It can carve through granite over time...when it is channeled properly. It takes on the shape of any container it's put in, so it's also flexible and easily manipulated. It can also quickly engulf a low-lying area and destroy and drown everything within when it is out of control. What a perfect analogy for time in my life. When I think of all of the good, productive things I could have done with time wasted or just not channeled properly, I want to cry. I'm turning 40 this year...and can never get one mismanaged second of those 40 years back for a "do over."

I have to chuckle a little...when I came up with the name for this blog, I was set on living my life on purpose with the principles I hold dear. And yet, a year might have gone by...I can't remember for sure when I started this blog...and I still struggle with the same issues when it comes to time and the management thereof. My purpose each day is vaguely to get up, get through the day, go to bed and start all over...hopefully doing something important that will have a positive impact in the light of eternity. I don't really think I'm doing what I set out to do. So, the chuckle turns to remorse...and a renewed sense of determination to finally tame time.

Just as with the changes I've made in how I cook and what we eat were made with a little here and a little there, along with plenty of grace for the times we end up eating something less than ideal, I also have to try and implement changes in this area in baby steps too. I can't wake up tomorrow and be instantly scheduley and routiney, no matter how much I may desire that. But what change to start with first?

First, I need to remember to not solely rely upon my own understanding...

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths.

Proverbs 3:5-6

My devotional times need to include checking in with God about His plans for my day...fortunately, His plans for me are good, and I will find them when I seek Him with my whole heart...

For surely I know the plans I have for you, says the LORD, plans for your welfare and not for harm, to give you a future with hope. Then when you call upon me and come and pray to me, I will hear you. When you search for me, you will find me; if you seek me with all your heart.

Jeremiah 29:11-13

Ultimately, my priorities need to be in line with God's heart and will for my life each day. No amount of time management, scheduling, planning or routines will matter at all if I am not living fully and purposefully for God. And as my priorities line up with God's, my days will become more purposeful, more meaningful, and more satisfying. I have to remember that life is more than checking off items on a to-do list...but that to-do list, that routine, plan or schedule - if implemented properly - will allow me to live more purposefully and have more time to devote to the things that matter most...

Serving my God

Loving my family

Blessing my friends

Reaching the lost

and savoring really, really good coffee...

Mushrooms and Memories on Mother's Day

2011-05-08T23:57:00.000-04:00

My 10 year old daughter took this picture today...I love it!

Today is Mother's Day...how did you celebrate the day? We spent the afternoon at a local State Park, on the hunt for the elusive (at least for us, anyway) Morel mushroom. My husband always says that Mother's Day weekend is the best time to find them. How ironic for me, though...to spend "my" special day searching for something I don't even like! Yeah, I am not a big fan of mushrooms. But I enjoy looking for them with my husband, and our daughter seems to have the mushroom eye. Daddy said she could go along mushroom hunting with him any time! One word of advice though...mushroom hunting with a three year old...a very busy three year old boy...is not easy. But it was so fun to see him having fun and experiencing the wonder of God's creation! Here are some pictures of our day, one we will all remember, I hope!

First, we play...while daddy scouts out some potential mushroom spots

The first casualty of the day...a splinter

Not sure how I got Little Mister to be still and pose so nicely, but glad for the great shot of my precious kiddos!

After texting daddy that the natives were getting restless and thirsty, he came back and unlocked the van. We had a quick snack and some water and then hit the trail...each with our own "mushroom stick"

Mushroom Hunter and Apprentice...lesson one, the stance

Mister tries his hand at searching for mushrooms

Look what Hannah found! Daddy walked right by it!

Her first mushroom...a half-free Morel

I couldn't believe I actually found a real Morel...this is the first Morel I've ever found!

We love nature...it's so fun! Except for the swarms of gnats lying in wait along the trail...

The kids and I stopped at the lake while Daddy ventured into the deep, dark woods to find some more mushrooms. Mister probably tossed half the gravel there into the lake! Here, he is observing the effects of gravity and fluid dynamics (:

It was very beautiful and serene here...I wished that Bob Ross was there to help me paint some happy little trees...

Some people say "cheese"...we say "Happy Stinkin' Gnat Day"
There were A LOT of gnats...it was like a Biblical Gnat plague, seriously...

Mister did great on our long trek in the woods at "Tato Creep" park...but fizzled out at the end and Daddy had to carry him a while. What a trouper though!

Our Morel "Motherload" - about a pound or so. Daddy found the biggest ones on his first search while we were at the playground.

Today was just absolutely lovely. The weather was perfect...a little over 70 degrees and sunny...we all just had a great time. It was so relaxing to stroll along in all that nature and drink in the beauty of all that God created. And marvel at the children He used me to create as well. I am so blessed to be their mother! God could have picked anyone to fill that role, but He chose me...sometimes I can't figure out exactly why, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

I will lay down and sleep in perfect peace tonight...

Watch Out…Extremists are Attacking Women!

2011-05-06T09:03:00.000-04:00

Sometimes I just can’t believe what is going on in this country. Observing political “discourse” is like hanging out at an elementary school playground…or a junior high school…and watching the superb socialization and interaction that goes on there. I recently signed a petition to support not using some dangerous chemical on our food crops. Today, I checked my email and found an email from CREDO, the organization behind the petition, declaring that extremists are attacking women. Being a woman, of course, I was alarmed…

The subject of the email was “Rep. Stutzman voted to redefine rape.” Alright, that is intriguing…just how can one redefine rape? I’m a pretty black-and-white person…rape is rape, there is no gray area…just like gluten-free, to me, means there’s no gluten in something, not just a trace…something the FDA apparently can’t decide on. Right is right, wrong is wrong…and yes, there are at times difficult and extenuating circumstances but for me, it all rests on a black and white foundation.

I was then informed that “251 extremists in the House of Representatives voted yesterday to approve an anti-choice bill that would significantly restrict women's access to abortion services and even "redefine rape." “ Anti-choice, of course, means anti-abortion…pro-choice does not tolerate a person choosing to not support abortion. I was also informed that my representative voted for it and was then encouraged to click on a link to tell him that I “consider his vote on H.R.3 to be an attack on women.”

Good grief…really? An elected official, voting according to what he believes to be right and good for the nation, is attacking women? Anyone with any sense of morality, any amount of maturity above the level of a teenager, and any common sense should be able to see that this group of people, while passionate about what they believe to be right and good, are stooping to juvenile levels and viciously attacking and name-calling because someone else has the audacity to have their own (differing) opinion!

What about tolerance? What about diversity? I thought we were all supposed to be free to believe and live (and vote) how we want? This double-standard absolutely drives me out of my ever-lovin’ mind. Pro-choice only means choosing to support abortion…what a misleading choice of wording. Even more disturbing is that so many people are apparently incapable of rightly discerning the truth behind the pro-abortion movement’s “noble” cause of affording women everywhere the right to “choose.”

I have exercised my own right, as a woman, to choose to not support abortion. And don’t argue with me about poor women not having access to the health care they “need.” The end does not justify the means. There is no situation in which I can believe that a bill that restricts abortions in some way is going to negatively impact women’s health. You want poor women to not be denied health “care”? How about we start with what gets them in trouble to begin with? But then we have to examine morality, and since morality can not, in actuality, have gray areas, it infringes on a person’s right to live their life how they please, consequences be damned.

I can not, in good conscience, remain on the email list of an organization that supports and encourages women to kill their own children. Fortunately, not only was there a link to be removed from the email list, there was also a box to comment on why I wanted to be removed. I doubt I’ll ever hear back from them regarding my comments…although if I do, I suspect it will be to condemn me for the CHOICE I made to not support the “pro-choice” movement.

Here is my comment:

I can agree with some of CREDO's positions (such as not using dangerous chemicals on our food), but can not support an organization that supports the killing of innocent human beings. CREDO obviously is infected with the same juvenile, hypocritical intolerance typical of many liberals...evidenced by the inflammatory and outrageous statement that "extremists" voting on an "anti-choice" bill to redefine rape is an "attack" on women. It apparent to me that "pro-choice", as defined by liberals, means people have the RIGHT to CHOOSE...ONLY as long as they choose to support abortion. If they exercise their RIGHT to CHOOSE to NOT support abortion, then they are demonized and called "extremists" who "attack" women. How so many people can be blind to this obvious double-standard, this INTOLERANCE to any beliefs or positions that are different than their own while demanding that everyone has the right to live and believe as they want to is beyond me. Honestly, watching the political discourse in this country is like observing children on the playground...cliques and temper-tantrums and name-calling...I can't believe this is the America I grew up loving and believing was the best country in the world. PROGRESSIVE? I don't think so...progress means moving forward, not regressing to elementary-level tactics.

And so, in light of this, I do not wish to receive any more emails from CREDO. Please, consider my opinion with an open mind, if that is at all possible for you, before labeling me one of those "extremist" right-wing nut-jobs who are out to "attack" women...I am a woman, and I am exercising my RIGHT to CHOOSE - and I choose to believe that human life begins at conception, that every embryo is unique in his or her own DNA and has the potential, if not destroyed, to become something wonderful. What if, in one of these abortions you so passionately fight for, the one human being who could have cured cancer was killed? Or the group of people, had they been allowed to live, who could have established world peace, now are tossed out like trash...and what if your own mother had chosen to kill YOU...do you ever think about that? This is what I have chosen to believe, can you put to practice what you preach and let me believe it without resorting to calling me names...can you be tolerant of MY beliefs?

So, if you consider believing that a human being is a human being at the moment he or she is conceived, just like a dog is a dog, a chicken is a chicken, a cat is a cat (for that is, after all, what each will become if they are allowed to develop unmolested); or if the term “pro-choice” actually means one is allowed to choose a side in this issue without being viciously attacked and called names, then please, by all means, call me extreme. I love my children, whom I chose to carry and give birth to, in the most extreme sense of the word…and I’m quite proud to be extreme. But don’t you dare say that because I don’t support your twisted view of human life that I am “attacking” women.

Real (Spiritual) Health Care Reform

2011-04-07T08:35:00.000-04:00

Sometimes conversations with God are, well, interesting. He always knows best, yet still gives us the freedom to choose. Here’s a bit of a chat God and I had this morning…

“Do you see that right there?”

“Yes, God…that’s that thing behind what I hate in myself…that thing that drives me to be what I don’t want to be”

“It’s a very deep, very old wound. You don’t even know what, exactly, it is.”

“Do I need to know?”

”No.”

“We’ve had this conversation before, haven’t we?”

“Yes, child, we have. Have you noticed I never say ‘How many times do I have to tell you…’?”

“Yes, God…thanks for that…”

“Are you ready to be free? Are you ready to let me remove that thing? It might be kind of painful…”

“Well, I think so…I mean, yes, I want to be free…but I’m not crazy about the painful part. Do you mean like you’re going to reach in and rip it out real quick, or I’ll be splayed out on the operating table for hours…days...weeks...months...years?”

“It’s up to you.”

From there, I proceeded to outline precisely the types of pain I did not wish to experience and possible procedures that I felt would not be helpful at all in the removal and healing of this deep-seated wound. Isn’t that something…me telling the One who knit me together in my mother’s womb how to fix me…when I don’t even fully understand the nature of the problem?

I imagined God as a surgeon…I’m sure he was smiling behind that mask. Kind of like when my son came to me the other day and informed me that frogs were dangerous. Because they have sharp teeth. I just smiled (well, tried not to burst out laughing, actually) and said that was very interesting and good to know. He was serious about the matter, but didn’t know what he was talking about. I’m seeing a similar picture here with myself.

You see, I’m very serious about being free from this old, nasty wound. I hate who I am at times...the way I react to situations or treat the ones I love the most. I know the impetus is that Wounded Place in my heart. It’s like a cancer, really. It’s eating me up inside, slowly but surely. But I don’t even know what it is…and yet, I think I can tell the Master Surgeon how to remove it. I don’t know what I’m talking about.

It’s great that God involves us in coordinating our spiritual health care plan. Sometimes, though, I wish He wouldn’t give me a choice – I have a hard time making decisions sometimes, especially when the options involve pain of undisclosed levels and intensities. “It might be kind of painful” is rather vague.

Anesthesia…that’s what I need.

¹⁶And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Comforter (Counselor, Helper, Intercessor, Advocate, Strengthener, and Standby), that He may remain with you forever--
¹⁷The Spirit of Truth, Whom the world cannot receive (welcome, take to its heart), because it does not see Him or know and recognize Him. But you know and recognize Him, for He lives with you [constantly] and will be in you.
¹⁸I will not leave you as orphans [comfortless, desolate, bereaved, forlorn, helpless]…

John 14:16-18 (AMP)

The sweet words of my precious Savior. Why should I give place to fear? It is just as destructive as the thing inside that is slowly eating me up, destroying the good in me bit by bit. And why shouldn’t I let God reform my spiritual health care? What I’ve been doing on my own really hasn’t been working so well. It’s time for a new approach…a ‘hands-off’ approach, if you will. Well, at least a MY hands-off approach…God’s hands fashioned me to begin with and He is fully able (and willing) to mend the broken areas in my heart.

Ok, God…I think I’m ready…let’s just get this over with, shall we? I’m going with Option A – Just Rip It Out Already…have at it…

I AM Jehova-Rapha...Yahweh-Rophe…I AM the God who heals you…

Exodus 15:26

image courtesy of clipartguide.com

gPod…Trusting God in Spite of It All

2011-04-01T07:08:00.000-04:00

Ever wake up with a song in your head? Something that speaks to a situation you’re facing? It’s like God is saying “don’t worry about it, I’ve got it under control…it’s all good!” And kind of like an iPod download…only I call it a gPod…you know, GodPod. Ok, corny…but still, I love free music downloads…especially ones that encourage me and lift my spirits!

I had some disappointment yesterday…long-awaited hopes dashed yet again. But this morning, I awoke with I Will Follow dancing through my head. I love this song…Chris Tomlin is an amazing artist, and his music touches my soul.

Hearing “all your ways are good, all your ways are sure, I will trust in You alone” first thing when I woke up today encourages me that in spite of how my plans have been derailed, God’s ways are good and I can trust Him.

I Will Follow (Chris Tomlin)

Where you go, I'll go
Where you stay, I'll stay
When you move, I'll move
I will follow...

All your ways are good
All your ways are sure
I will trust in you alone
Higher than my sight
High above my life
I will trust in you alone

Where you go, I'll go
Where you stay, I'll stay
When you move, I'll move
I will follow you
Who you love, I'll love
How you serve I'll serve
If this life I lose, I will follow you
I will follow you

Light unto the world
Light unto my life
I will live for you alone
You're the one I seek
Knowing I will find
All I need in you alone, in you alone

In you there's life everlasting
In you there's freedom for my soul
In you there joy, unending joy
and I will follow

Thanks God…I really need this today. I was feeling like You played a dirty trick on me yesterday…or April Fool’s came a day early. Forgive me for not trusting You…help me keep my eyes on You and not on the situation at hand.

Jeremiah 29:11-13 (New King James Version)
¹¹ For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. ¹² Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. ¹³ And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.

[Pt 3] K12FreeHomeSchool and Mimi Rothschild: My Own Experience

2011-03-31T15:06:00.000-04:00

In my eagerness to present a true account of my experience with K12FREEHOMESCHOOL and Mimi Rothschild, I did not count the cost in how I presented my story. I'm afraid that it's possible that the manner in which I structured my posts was not as helpful as I'd hoped. I in no way wanted to hinder or harm Mrs. Rothschild or her business. I did not consider that perhaps people would not read all three posts to get the "whole picture" and only focus on the less than flattering aspects of my experience. In an effort to present the whole story and not provide opportunity for others to link to only the bad parts of my experience, I have consolidated this three-part series into one. You can read it here...I've provided a summary of my experience and then the original, unaltered posts follow.

[Pt 2] K12FreeHomeSchool and Mimi Rothschild: My Own Experience

2011-03-28T15:02:00.000-04:00

[Pt 1] K12FreeHomeSchool and Mimi Rothschild: My Own Experience

2011-03-25T12:31:00.000-04:00

How I Experience You…

2011-03-24T20:33:00.000-04:00

Have you ever had a friend ask you a question that was hard to answer? I was asked this question by another dear friend who has moved far away to the other side of the country almost, and another in our little group asked it as well. It's How Do You Experience Me? I haven't been brave enough to ask it yet, but my friend Heather said post this answer to her question on my blog, so I am. Hhhhmmm...should I ask you to leave a comment about how you experience me? I think that sounds dangerous, so I won't...LOL!

Good thing you are sitting down you know…or you’d probably fall right off your chair, wouldn’t you? I’m sure you gave up on ever getting a response from me…you probably thought I forgot. Couldn’t blame you…I do forget things a little too often.

Maybe you thought I was avoiding the question all together. No, not really. Maybe a little, because that’s one of those Real Questions and I’m not always real good at real stuff. I’m usually so concerned about what someone else will think that I can’t always be as real as I want to.

Well, when you were in Arizona…in the overly sunny land of people with common sense about time…and you said when you got back we would have to blog together since I’d have my Little Blue Friend, I decided right then that the first thing I would whip up would be the answer to your question. Isn’t that clever?

So, now that your cardiac issues have been resolved, be sure to fasten your seatbelt, put your chair back into an upright position and hold on, because I’m Going To Be Real:

….da da da da da da da…da da da da DA da da da da…

…boy I sure want more iced tea but that line is terribly long…

Wait…you want Real, not Stream of Consciousness, right? Ok…

You’ve said to me before that you don’t think you’re a good friend. I’m pretty sure I’ve told you that’s pretty much a bunch of crap. You are a great friend! Yes, you have things about you that aren’t ideal, but then who doesn’t? I know you could rattle off a few about me, surely! (But wait until I ask you…)
You are…
giving
honest
loyal
dependable
hysterical
inspiring
encouraging
fascinating
Good friends give…they give their time, opinions, shoulders for crying upon, advice, things they have that their friends need without keeping score. They are honest and tell you things you need to hear, even when you don’t want to hear it. They got your back, and you know that no matter what they are there for you. And if someone attacks you, they are there to defend your honor. They make you laugh so hard you’re likely to pee your pants and they inspire you by how they live – taking on challenges other people wouldn’t touch, making the ordinary seem extraordinary and igniting a desire to learn and achieve in others. They encourage you when the world has beaten the crap out of you and all you want to do is crawl into a hole where nothing exists and no one knows you're there, so you can fade away into nothingness. They remind you of what is important in your life and why you need to be present…that others are counting on you, like your family and your friends. They are fascinating, because while they share the same interests with you, they also have interests of their own and love to share them and teach you if you’re interested. And they always seem to have something interesting hidden away somewhere inside…there is always treasure to seek out within them.

Yes, that They I’m referring to is you. Just realized I should have been saying ‘you’ LOL…well, I finally got on a roll…you know how that is. But anyway, that’s the good I see and experience of you. You are honestly one of the most interesting friends I’ve ever had. I don’t mean that in a But She Has A Nice Personality kind of way, you surprise me often, and I love that! You’ve had some crazy adventures and I love hearing about them! And even though you sometimes sell yourself short, you are someone I look up to and admire, and would like to be more like.

Now, with that being said, the other side of the Heather Harris Experience (just thought of Jimi Hendrix there….LOL) is that sometimes you can be very abrupt…sometimes your honesty is brutal (but then sometimes brutal honesty is necessary), and sometimes, I just don’t know how to take you because I haven’t yet deciphered your particular brand of sarcasm…those little nuances that are unique to you that take time to pick up on.

But Heather, what all this boils down to is that I just love you to pieces…even if I don’t always ‘get’ you…because you ‘get’ me. I can talk about things with you that I can’t talk about with, say, Someone Else, because you know exactly what I’m talking about and where I’m coming from…and you wouldn’t write me off as heading to hell in a handbasket because I Went There...(sorry folks, location joke (; )

There is so much good in you that I am willing to take the bad right along with it. I understand why you are the way you are sometimes, other times I don’t…but that doesn’t matter to me, I know it’s something I’ll learn in time. You are a worthwhile investment of my time, my energy, my resources, and my heart and I am so very, very grateful that God brought us together.

This concludes the trip on the Real Express. Please wait until the ride has come to a complete stop before unfastening your seat belt and moving around the cabin. We hope you’ve enjoyed your experience with us and that you’ll travel Real Express again soon. Have a nice day and thank you for choosing Real Express.
Ok, that was kind of dumb…but thanks for asking me this question…a million apologies for taking so long to get this done…and I hope that this answers the question satisfactorily.

Love you always,

Dawn <3

Spring Brings Renewal…Under My Kitchen Sink

2011-03-22T14:33:00.000-04:00

Do you have one (or more) of those areas in your home that most of the time goes unnoticed, even though you use it frequently? Do you ever think, every now and then, “I ought to do something about that”…and then, don’t? I must confess to having too many of those areas, but one such disaster zone got a makeover this week…yep, Spring makes me want to fix things up. Take a look…

The cabinet under my kitchen sink is something that is used nearly every day here. The dish drainer and dishpans are stored there, as well as dirty towels and dishcloths, various cleaning supplies, and who knows what else. We moved here about three and a half years ago, and while it’s embarrassing to admit, I’ve never cleaned under there! I would notice that it needs to be done, but that’s as far as it got.

There, I confessed…feels good to get that off my chest.

I bought a new dish drainer recently, so I could pass the old one (that I’ve hated since I bought it I don’t know how many years ago) on to Number One who is moving into his first apartment in a few days. It’s larger than the other one, and subsequently does not fit in the space the old one did. So, I was forced to pull everything out of there…and come face-to-face with the grim reality that it was, indeed, time to clean under there. See for yourself:

After painting and putting some floor tile down under there, I commented about it on Facebook. A friend of mine asked me why I painted under the sink because nobody sees it. My response to her was that I see it…in fact, I see it every day and even though after a while the jumbled, disorganized disaster under there quit registering when I opened the cabinet doors, in the back of my mind that little voice nagged and condemned me. And so, I did something about it and shut up that voice. See…nothing to complain about now:

And now, I only have the things I really need and use under there…

Well, I take that back…I do need to empty the dirty towel bucket and do some laundry…but, aside from that, it is neat and tidy under there now. Much, much better! And, there’s one less thing for Miss You’ll-Never-Be-Good-Enough to use against me…

Daylight Slaving Time: It’s All About the Money

2011-03-13T04:59:00.001-04:00

It's that time of year again...time for my semi-annual Rant and Rave about DST, or as I so affectionately call it, Dumb Stupid Time. This year, I decided to do a little research on the origins and effects of this asinine practice. I learned a few things and was surprised by some others. Read on, then share your opinion on DST by leaving a comment below.

Growing up in Indiana, we never participated in DST (at least not in my lifetime). It still affected every day life, however. The TV shows you were used to were on at a different time. If you went to Michigan in the summer, you had to remember they were an hour ahead…at least, if you had to be somewhere at a specific time.

It was commonly accepted that the reason for DST was because the farmers needed more daylight to get the harvest in and that Benjamin Franklin was the genius who started it. Looking into the matter, I discovered that what I’d always believed about DST was completely wrong.

A Bit of History

Ancient civilizations adjusted their daily schedules along with the sun, but with more flexibility than DST affords. Daylight was divided into twelve hours regardless of the length of the day, so each daylight hour was longer in the summer. Roman water clocks had different scales for different months of the year.

Benjamin Franklin did not start DST at all. He “anonymously published a letter suggesting that Parisians economize on candles by rising earlier to use morning sunlight. This 1784 satire proposed taxing shutters, rationing candles, and waking the public by ringing church bells and firing cannons at sunrise.” It wasn’t too popular back then, either.

Modern DST was first proposed in 1895 when George Vernon Hudson, a New Zealand entomologist, presented a paper to the Wellington Philosophical Society proposing a two hour daylight saving shift and again in 1898 after much interest was expressed. Apparently, we can thank his leisure time activities of collecting bugs, which made him appreciate the value of after-hours daylight. Great, I have to lose an hour of sleep because of a bug collector. That really bugs me.

Many people erroneously credit William Willet, who was an English builder, for coming up with the idea for DST. He did independently come up with that crazy idea, but not until 1905. He published his proposal to bump the clocks ahead in the summertime two years later, which was taken up by LIBERAL member of Parliament, Robert Pearce and who introduced the first DST bill to the House of Commons in 1908. It did not become law, and several other similar bills failed in the years to come, but Willet lobbied for DST until his death in 1915.

In 1916, Germany first began to implement DST to conserve coal during the war. Many other European nations hopped on the DST bandwagon soon after, with Russia adopting it in 1917 and the United States in 1918. Congress repealed DST in 1919, but it was observed again during WWII, again to save energy.

Even after the war, farmers still did not like DST because it actually adversely affects farming - “grain harvesting is best done after dew evaporates, so when field hands arrive and leave earlier in summer their labor is less valuable.” Minnesota farmers complained in 1959 that they can’t get into the fields any earlier than when standard time is observed because the morning sun does not dry the dew under DST (Minneapolis Star, Jan 28, 1959.)

Between WWII and 1966, when the federal Uniform Time Act became law, observance of DST was left up to states and localities. Of course, this created a confusing “patchwork” of times, hence the passing of the UTA. States that wished to be exempt from observing DST could do so by passing a state law.

But It’s the Green Way to Keep Time, Right?

There are a lot of claims to “energy savings” during DST, but does the research actually back it up? Let’s take a look…

In 1975, a DOT study concluded that an energy savings of 1% was likely. A review of the study by the NBS in 1976 showed no significant changes.
A 2006-07 Western Australia study showed an over all increase in energy consumption of .06% – DST caused an increase of energy consumption in the hotter days and a decrease in the cooler days.
(Here’s my favorite…) “A 2008 study examined billing data in Indiana before and after it adopted DST in 2006, and concluded that DST increased overall residential electricity consumption by 1% to 4%, due mostly to extra afternoon cooling and extra morning heating; the main increases came in the fall. The overall annual cost of DST to Indiana households was estimated to be $9 million, with an additional $1.7–5.5 million for social costs due to increased pollution.” Terrific job, Mitch…thanks a lot…

And what about the brilliant idea in 2007 of extending DST another four to five weeks, moving the start of DST up two weeks? A California study in 2007 showed little or no effect. In fact, while the DOE concluded in 2008 that there was an energy savings of .5%, that was ONLY for the electricity used during the extended period, not the entire eight months of DST and did not include a study of the use of heating fuels. AND, while proponents claimed that the move would save the equivalent of 10,000 barrels of oil per day, that was based on information from the 70’s – the DOE no longer stands by the accuracy or relevance of that information.

It’s Dumb, It’s Stupid, and It’s Bad for Your Health and Safety

I was surprised to find that there isn’t necessarily an increase in traffic fatalities and traffic-pedestrian fatalities, but rather evidence suggests a decrease. North America and the UK show a correlation between clock-changing and traffic accidents, but Finland and Sweden do not. However, as far as personal safety on the job and health effects, these facts are not surprising:

A 2009 U.S. study found that on Mondays after the switch to DST, workers sleep an average of 40 minutes less, and are injured at work more often and more severely.
Changing clocks disrupts sleep and reduces its efficiency
Male suicide rates rise after “falling forward”
The effects of messing with the Circadian Rhythm can be severe and last for weeks (and I can vouch for MONTHS)

In 2005 the government of Kazakhstan abolished DST because of health complications attributed to DST!

From the time we “spring forward” until a few days after “falling back” to normal time again, I spend my days in a foggy stupor. I am tired and dragging all summer long, when I should be out enjoying the nice weather and all that lovely, cancer-causing daylight. I just want to hibernate all summer long. I have recently developed some health issues, and while I can’t completely blame DST for them, I am certain that it exacerbated them.

Do You Want Fries With That DST?

No discussion of government antics would be complete without a look at the bottom line, and who benefits most from a healthy one.

In the mid 80’s, Clorox and 7-11 provided the primary funding for the Daylight Saving Time Coalition’s push for the extension of DST in 1987. Both Idaho senators voted for it, based on the premise that fast-food restaurants sell more fries during DST! And what do they grow in abundance in Idaho? Why, potatoes, of course!

In 2005, the Sporting Goods Manufacturers Association and the National Association of Convenience Stores successfully lobbied for the 2007 extension to U.S. DST. Of course, with more daylight hours we’ll have more time for sports…which requires equipment…and apparently a stop at 7-11 for some slurpees afterward. I couldn’t find any mention of Big Pharma, but I’m sure there’s no objection on their part to the prescriptions for sleeping pills so we can get to sleep when it’s still broad daylight out…or the antidepressants because we’re sleep-deprived and slightly mentally unstable…

More Government Control, Please, We Certainly Don’t Have Enough

Of course, the argument can be made that it’s just one more way for the government, which our founding fathers intended not to be the out-of-control monstrosity that it is today, to tell us how to live, how to think and what to do.

I came across a comment on Facebook today that made me look at Dumb Stupid Time in a whole new light:

Evelina Marie EEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKK! I dislike time change so much. *sigh* I lived in Japan for nearly 20 years and was so spoiled without the time change. I can't get use to it after 15 years. It is like a mass, government ordered jet lag. I'll feel so out of sync with the rest of the world till we go back to normal time. : ( (emphasis mine)

I suppose it’s rather convenient for Them that the sheeple are tired, disoriented, confused and distracted. It makes it a lot easier to stick it to us when we’re not paying attention to the shenanigans in the White House…yep, Dumb Stupid Time is a conspiracy…a nefarious plot to destroy our great nation…can’t say that I’m surprised really. I knew that there was more than one reason I despised, loathed, detested and abhorred it. Between the advertising industry and Big Brother, They’ve found a great way to keep us all in line. But not me…nooooooo way…I will NOT conform…

…in fact, I’m going to buy myself a special watch to wear just during Dumb Stupid Time, so I’ll never have to change a clock. I grudgingly change my watch after several days, since the DST-induced stupor I’m in makes it difficult to figure out what time it is…and what time zone, for that matter. Since I refuse to do it, my husband changes all the clocks. You know, I’m starting to question who’s side he’s really on…

many thanks to Wikipedia for the exhaustive study of the history of DST: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daylight_saving_time and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_time_in_the_United_States

The Emptying Nest

2011-03-05T16:34:00.001-05:00

I feel funny writing something “empty nest” related. I mean, I’m not even 40 yet and our youngest just turned three. But, as it often is with blended families, we have the whole gamut here in age ranges: 20, 18, 16, 10 and 3.

We’ve had our share of difficulties over the years, some unbelievably hard…the kind that can kill a marriage and rip a family apart. But, by the grace and faithfulness of God we weathered each storm that came our way…unfortunately, not completely intact but still, not completely destroyed either. There is still hope.

Now we are entering into what will be a very long season of nest-emptying. The oldest is moving out by the end of the month. I wish that it was happening under better circumstances, but choices were made and consequences followed as is the way of things. The next oldest, although he doesn’t live with us, is leaving for Marine boot camp (HOO-RAH!!) in September…and going all the way to the other side of the world in California.

All these birdies flying the nest cause me to become quite introspective. As most parents do, I have many regrets. All of our good intentions didn’t always turn out the way we intended. And some of the issues we had to deal with along the way made it excruciatingly difficult to be the parents these fine young men needed. Now, they are about to enter the big, bad world on their own.

They will make their own choices…how much that reflects on us and our parenting skills is not quite clear for me. On one hand, we, as parents, have had set before us the task of teaching them right from wrong and to model how to be a responsible and productive citizen. We should teach them to be compassionate and care for others, to be good stewards of God’s creation, and to have impeccable integrity. When we succeed in those areas, they can learn well…and when we fail in those areas, they learn as well.

Then we have the other hand…

They will make their own choices…

And, chances are, at least some of those choices would not be ones we would make. Or possibly choices anyone should make. These young men are perfectly capable of making good choices and being responsible. Whether or not they do is up to them. It’s hard to let go and let them be themselves.

I am fully prepared to be proud of their successes. That part is very easy. But how will I react…or respond, rather, when they fail? I don’t want to sound like I expect them to fail…it’s just a fact of life that people in general make mistakes and fail at things. And when you’re a young adult out on your own for the first time, the world can be a minefield of potential mistakes. How do we respond when they step on one of those and - God forbid – get hurt?

Natural Consequences are wonderful teachers. They do a better job of teaching than Advice From Parents. I don’t know why I get so irritated when the 20 year old asks for advice then does the complete opposite. But then, the nurturing part of a parent’s heart doesn’t want to see their children get hurt and wants to swoop in and rescue them when they do. It’s so fine, that line between helping and enabling!

Really, the best advice I can think of is to remember that God is in control all the time. And when His children, which is exactly who our children are, mess up, He is there to gently correct and guide and to bind up the wounds of the brokenhearted. My job as parent will move from taking care of the immediate here-and-now needs…the never-ending need for food and shelter and clean underwear and food (did I mention BOY at all?) to a 24/7 need for prayer and support. The trick is knowing how support without hindering or enabling. For that, prayer is also quite handy…as long as I listen to what God is saying…

And so…while I would be fibbing if I didn’t admit that I’m looking forward to Number One moving out, since we don’t exactly get along famously, still, there is a sense of unease and a sudden desire to protect him building within me. Regardless of our differences and the list of things that annoy us about each other, he is still my family. I still want to see him succeed. I still want the best for him. And I am still grieved by the circumstances that have launched his foray into the big, bad world.

Number Two won’t be leaving for several months yet, and we still have his high school graduation to look forward to, his open house to plan, and a summer to spend with him yet…unless, of course, he is too busy working. But, at least he’ll be around and we can see him more easily than when he’s a zillion miles away in California.

My mind, which contains the vapors of mistakes made mere years ago, takes those memories of failures and hairs-of-chinny-chin-chins and weaves them into what could become in the months and years ahead for these boys. I don’t want them to repeat my own mistakes, or the mistakes of their parents…but I can’t control them and micromanage their lives. They alone must responsibly use and manage the freedom that adulthood brings.

So, for now, I will plan on spending more time in prayer for these young men. And start making plans on what to do with Number One’s room when he moves out…

GIVEAWAY ALERT: Reshaping It All by Candace Cameron Bure and Darlene Schacht

2011-03-02T21:25:00.000-05:00

Who among us wouldn't want to reshape things in their life - physically...spiritually? Are you inspired by the stories of people who have been where you are and overcome the same things you struggle with? Then head on over to The Homesteading Hippy's website, read her review of Bure and Schacht's Reshaping It All, and enter for your chance to win this book!

Homekeeper's Journal 1-19-2011

2011-01-19T10:38:00.000-05:00

Click above to participate in the Home Keeper's Journal!

In my homey kitchen …..
It's clean! It's clean! It's clean! And there is sticky rice soaking for lunch later today. Having a friend over for Bang Bang Chicken and sticky rice...haven't seen her in at least 6 years so I'm really looking forward to our lunch today and to meeting her cutie pie little boy!
My thoughts on being at home ……
I know this is where I belong...I just hate that I can't seem to "get it together" when it comes to being organized and keeping on top of clutter and cleaning. I don't want to be anywhere else, I love this job! But when I look back on from whence I came, I'm amazed. God is faithful. God is good. And God is not done with me yet...thankfully...
A constant habit I have of making my home comfortable is ….
Constant habit...hhhmmmm....I'm not sure on this one. My constant habits seem to be being inconsistent and being to out-of-sight-out-of-mind-y. If I had to choose something, it would be making delicious and nourishing meals.
If I could change the decor of my home ….
Definitely new furniture and family pictures on the walls. And less stuff, more open space.
What I want my children/spouse/other family to remember about my home is …
… that it was a comfortable, inviting place where they could be themselves and feel welcome. (copying from the Christian Homekeeper Network...I'm working on this one, but that is what I would like)
Home …
is where I want to be...with my family and friends...doing the work set before me and letting the love of Christ flow through me. I miss that mark way too often, but I'm constantly working toward that and I know that God is helping me get there.

A Simple Woman's Daybook: January 10, 2011

2011-01-10T10:18:00.000-05:00

Click above to go to The Simple Woman's Daybook and read more entries from other bloggers!

FOR TODAY...

Outside my window...cold...snowy

I am thinking... of how to get everything done that needs done today

I am thankful for...my family, friends, church and freedom

I am wearing...my pj's and toasty warm robe, although I have showered already...didn't want to wake my son in getting clothes around. Kids are up, I ought to get dressed now!

I am remembering... the ways God has provided for us in times where there just seemed to be no way at all

I am going... to have to attend a funeral this week

I am currently reading...Taking Care of the Me in Mommy by Lisa Welchel

I am hoping... to be able to resist the temptation to eat sugar as I start a 21 Day Prayer and Fasting with my church

On my mind... letting go, or trying to anyway, of some "stuff" that impedes progress and helps feed chaos in my home

Noticing that... I just plain have way too much stuff. Wondering why I just can't get rid of it...

Pondering these words... How far will you let me go, Jesus? How abandoned can I get? ~Mike Bickle, The Bride of Christ Studies

In the kitchen...the dishes are done, the counters need decluttering, the floor needs mopped, and bread needs to get started

Around the house...the "mathom room" has been cleared out, thanks to the hard work of my husband and youngest stepson...now to start packing up out-of-season things and things I don't use often...to be inspected in a few months and sold/given away if not used

One of my favorite things... snuggling under mounds of blankets in a cool room on a soft, snowy winter's night

From my picture journal...

Beautiful, snowy scene behind our church Sunday

My New Year's Resolution Simply Put: Freedom

2011-01-06T06:53:00.000-05:00

2 Corinthians 3:17 (Amplified Bible)

¹⁷Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty (emancipation from bondage, freedom).

What Did You Just Ask Me?

2011-01-05T21:31:00.000-05:00

Haven't blogged for a while...the days have been quite ordinary lately. Then one day you get up and everything's like the day before and the day before that and the day before the day before that...until...

In all fairness, my stepson did mention earlier today that he wanted to talk to his father and I after dad got home from work, so I knew something was coming. I really hate it when people say "I want to talk to you later" and then leave you hanging. Opens the door to all kinds of worries and imaginary crises...unless, of course, you're one of those eternally optimistic people who probably imagine winning the lottery, an end to war, a cure for cancer, or even a truly bi-partisan government who can put aside petty differences in order to make wise, fiscally sound decisions that will make all of America happy and blissful once again. But, I digress...

Even with the warning of some impending information that may or may not be good, I was completely shocked. Totally and completely shocked. Still am, really.

So what was this thing he needed to discuss with us? Apparently his mother wanted to come and visit him and his brothers and needed a place to stay...so could she stay in our spare bedroom for just one night?

Really. He actually asked us that. I'm not making this up just to create a sensational blog entry. He actually asked if my husband's ex could spend the night in our home. As if.

My husband was quite to the point: "No." and he walked back down into the basement, where he and the landlord were working on fixing the contraption in the basement ironically called a "furnace."

Thanks. That left me there...stuck as I was because I was cleaning out our refrigerator, which had taken on a rather disgusting funk that could not be precisely pinned down without removing all of the contents and giving each one the Sniff Test. Loads of fun, really.

Number One really couldn't see what the big deal was. I tried to explain that it was completely inappropriate for an ex-spouse to spend the night in the home of her former and very happily remarried spouse. Especially when the three of us really don't like each other all that much. Even if we all had a "normal" (or maybe getting along and being friends isn't normal, I don't know...I do know the the dynamics here are strained and strange) kind of divorce relationship, it would still be completely inappropriate.

I suppose I should mention here that Number One is 20 years old. Legally an adult, yet still quite naïve to the complex issues that plague adults...especially when it comes to divorce etiquette.

Then, to make the Shock and Awe campaign complete, he asks if she could stay in the old building on our town lot referred to as a "barn." It really is a barn, as our century-plus home once sat out in the country. It probably had animals in it at one time...now it's more of a storage area for I'm not even sure what...it doesn't belong to us, I don't ask questions. Or go in there much.

I said, "Are you kidding?"

Apparently not...he had actually thought this out. The plan included something about him pulling his car in there and she could sleep in his car. In case you are reading this from a nice, warm climate...let me assure you it's quite chilly here in Northern Indiana...in January. I think this would be referred to as "grasping at straws." Although no straws were being extended, believe you me.

I was then informed that we "suck" as he stormed out of the house. Guess we're doing something right if he still disagrees with our decisions...(thanks, Sissy! <3 ya!)

It was truly heartbreaking, once you got past the audaciousness of the whole thing, to witness this young man's desperation to make this trip, which seems to hinge on whether or not his mom can find somewhere to stay, possible. It's been a while since he's seen her. I get that, I really do. I'm sure right now he, and everyone he tells this story to, thinks we are cold, callous and heartless. Some day, and I don't hope this for him at all, if he is divorced and remarried, he'll understand where we are coming from. Or at least will have the opportunity to understand.

And honestly, it's very unfortunate that his mother is in this position...however, it is not our responsibility to provide lodging for her. She's an adult, and while asking someone if she can stay with them while she is in town is not unreasonable, asking her remarried ex if she can stay at his place is completely and utterly outrageous. I certainly hope this was Number One's harebrained idea and not hers. I'm just not sure what I'd have to say about it if she was the one who talked him into asking us that.

But...I guess I have to give him credit for having the guts to ask it. And for not telling me I'm going to be a grandma. Big kudos for that. Big BIG kudos for that...

I do hope she can find suitable accommodations and that her and the boys can have a wonderful, healing and blessed visit together. They all really need that. But it won't be happening here. And don't try to make me feel guilty by saying we should extend Christian charity to those in need...Jesus said pray for people and do good, turn the other cheek, etc. but he did not say anything about being a doormat. He wasn't a doormat when he tossed the money changers out of the temple. Jesus is kind and gentle and loving, but he does not "enable" people!

So, it will be very interesting to see how this all unfolds. I really do hope the visit will work out for them. And I hope for the sake of sanity, peace, and all that is holy and good she plans on not stopping by any time soon. That's just where I am at the moment. God is working on that...I suppose all of this is part of His plan to work that "stuff" out of my heart. But really, God...seriously? Surely You jest...I know all about Your sense of humor...

Lord, please help this mother and her sons to be able to visit together. Bless her with a beautiful and relaxing place to stay in an environment full of your grace, presence and love. And please help Number One to understand why we just can't let her stay here...

A Strongly Worded Letter

2010-12-10T20:12:00.000-05:00

I have threatened on many occasions to "write a strongly worded letter" to whomever is in charge of whatever I am upset/disappointed/irritated with, but I don't think I've actually ever followed through with that. It's an expression my husband and I use often, jokingly. That, however, changed today - when I redeemed some Speedy Rewards Points in an effort to be frugal while out and about and got way less than I bargained for. Here's the Strongly Worded Letter I just sent to air my grievances:

Hello,

I have been a Speedy Rewards member for many years now and have always been pretty happy with your system and the products you carry in your stores.

Today, however, I was EXTREMELY disappointed in the quality of the food items I redeemed a few thousand reward points on. Specifically, the Bacon Double Cheeseburger and the Cheeseburger, which I got for my son.

I can honestly say without any doubt or exaggeration they were the absolute worst burgers we have ever eaten. Completely disgusting, actually. And I highly doubt it had anything to do with "freshness". I would be very surprised to learn that there was ANYTHING resembling beef, or any type of meat, for that matter, in those burgers. The taste and texture were terrible! I had already left the store where I got them before I realized how awful they were and was in a hurry to get to my next destination, or I'd have gone back.

I am very disappointed that I used 2500 points on sandwiches that could only be called "food" in the wildest stretch of the imagination. This is the first time I have gotten any hot sandwiches at a Speedway store, and after this experience I don't think I will ever want to waste my points and take a risk like that again.

I would very much appreciate a refund of the 2500 points I used on those sandwiches today. And I'd like to encourage you to seriously consider a different supplier of hamburger patties for your hot sandwiches, preferably a supplier who actually uses ground beef instead of soy, which these very obviously were. And, in the interest of those who suffer from food allergies, clearly indicating on the label that there is a high amount of TVP in those "burgers" (or that they are 100% TVP, as I highly suspect is the case) would be very beneficial. I couldn't find the ingredients in the "nutritional information" on this website, and no longer have the wrapping to check and see if it is there. I do wish now I would have kept it.

I would also like you to know that I am a blogger, and will be posting my letter to you and your response, for which I eagerly await. I am assuming that, in keeping with your President's statement of commitment to conducting its operations in accordance with both the law and the highest standards of business ethics and integrity, you will endeavor to ensure this long-standing member of your Rewards program is satisfied and my trust in your company's operations is not misplaced.

Thank you for taking the time to read this and have a very blessed holiday.

Sincerely,

Dawn Yoder

Of course, I probably should note that I am in no way attempting to disparage or libel Speedway Super America, but merely want to inform other consumers of the experience I had there as well as document their response to a very unsatisfied customer. This is the first time I have been so disappointed and dissatisfied while patronizing their establishments. I sincerely hope that they will grant my request of refunding the reward points I feel that I wasted today. Usually, we use those to get a lower price on gas for our van but today I thought I'd be frugal and not spend money eating out. Brilliant, I tell you...

And, as one who is trying to not eat "junk" as much as possible, I wrestled with the decision to get those "burgers" and decided once in a while won't kill us...probably. While we are still alive, I can honestly say I don't feel well at all tonight...not in a food-poisoning type of way, but more like I have just experienced an extreme chemical assault. If I had realized that "burger" on the label was merely a suggestion, not an actual representation of what was inside the wrapper, I never would have gotten them. I think I just discovered how we can win that war in Afghanistan...and where they've been hiding the WMD's...

I will follow up with whatever response I receive from Speedway Super America's Customer Service Team. Assuming, of course, my blog doesn't get shut down for mentioning "Afghanistan" and "WMD's"!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
UPDATE:

It is now Monday, December 20 and I have not yet received a reply to this message. I have sent another message, willing to give them the benefit of the doubt as anything can happen to an electronic message...including being accidentally deleted by one's spouse perhaps. I haven't asked my husband yet, but it is a plausible possibility. We'll see what comes of this...

Dear Speedway,

I sent a message on this site a week ago (Friday, December 10, 2010) and have not yet received a reply. I am hoping that something happened in the transmission of your reply, perhaps, or that my husband may have inadvertently deleted your email, because I surely do not want to believe that you are not going to address my grievance with the quality of your "burgers" and the the 2500 points I feel were wasted on them.

I realize that this time of year is a busy time for everyone, however, I believe that no reply from your company (if that indeed was the case) regarding a very unsatisfied customer is surely not in keeping with your claim to conduct your business according to "the highest standards of business ethics and integrity."

In case you have lost my previous message, I will copy it below for your convenience. And again, I eagerly await your reply and a resolution to this matter.

Sincerely,

Dawn Yoder
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Message originally sent on Friday, December 10, 2010:
(in the interest of space, you can read it above if you wish).

And the lovely message after I clicked submit was...

Thank You

Thank you for your interest in Speedway.
We will respond to all inquiries in a timely manner.

Perhaps we have a different opinion of what a "timely manner" means...

GREAT NEWS! Apparently, their response must have been deleted or missed somehow. I received another reply and not only did they refund the points I used, but also another 2500! That makes me very happy. Thank you, Speedway, for going above and beyond to restore this customer's confidence in you!

DIY: Make Your Own Marshmallows...Really, You Can!

2010-12-03T21:45:00.000-05:00

OK, so this is totally against all the "real foodie" in me...but in my quest to spend as little money on things as I can by making as many things as I can myself, I have wondered:

Can I make a healthy, or healthier, marshmallow?
Is it even possible to make your own marshmallows without the benefit of ginormous industrial equipment or magical woodland elves?

Well, as it so happens, I can at least answer one of those questions...and it's Yes, You Can Make Your Own Marshmallows In The Comfort Of Your Very Own Kitchen! I found this neat video tutorial (via Money Saving Mom...if you haven't checked her site out yet do it now, it's great!) on the Denver Bargains site...check it out! And amaze your friends this holiday season with delicious, easy and inexpensive "gourmet" marshmallows!

Meanwhile, I'm going to see if it's possible to make a healthy marshmallow...since corn syrup is on my NO WAY JOSE list these days...

Entitlement Mentality: From a Nation of Entrepreneurs and Hard Workers to a Nation of Whiners

2010-11-09T13:45:00.000-05:00

We have a free, local paper here that has a column called "Speak Out." It has long been a source of amusement for me, to read the complaints (such as "we live in the United States of America but I don't understand why we have so many Canada Geese"), bizarre questions and various soapbox diatribes that people call in to have included in the column. Today, however, I just about had an aneurysm.

There has been a slowly simmering discontent within me regarding the Entitlement Mentality that has what seems to be a death grip on the populace of this great nation. A nation forged out of adversity, by hard-working people, people who traveled thousands of miles in unfathomable conditions just to have a shot at the "American Dream", as well as people born here to families who knew the value and importance of taking care of their own.

The blurb featured on the front page of the paper caused my jaw to drop and my dander to rise. I turned quickly to the column to read the whole comment, not wanting to take anything out of context, only to find that I was definitely NOT taking anything out of context. I will include the full comment here for your perusal:

We Are Struggling

I'd like to see those presidents live on what we have to live on. Why do we have to struggle when they are not struggling?

They could give some of their money to some of us other people like senior citizens and other people who don't have jobs. They could hand some of that money over to us.

But they don't need it. They're already millionaires. Let them share it with us. We need it. They don't.

I'd like to know if I am the only one who feels this way because it kind of makes me mad to think we have to struggle when they are not struggling at all.

There are some weeks I don't even have money for groceries. If it wouldn't be for my little garden, I wouldn't even have any grocery money.

Let me start by saying that I am not a millionaire. I know what it's like to not know how we're going to pay the utility bill in the dead of winter, or the rent, or how to feed five people on $60 a week. I've even had a food stamp card. So I get struggling to make ends meet. And I feel for those who are in that position right now. And I wouldn't mind having some of what those millionaires have, either, for the record. It would sure make things easier here!

I don't know this person's situation, either, so it would be unfair for me to categorically include them in the masses inflicted with Entitlement Mentality. But it sure does seem that this person has a raging case of it by what they said.

So now, tell me, why do millionaires have to share their millions with you? To "hand some of that money" over to you? Just because you don't have any? How does that even make sense? To expect someone who has more than you to just hand money over to you because you do not, well, to me that sounds very childish. Because the underlying message here is that "it's not fair" that someone has more than you.

When, exactly, did life become fair? Is it even reasonable to expect fairness in every area of life? Liberals have some good ideas...of course we should do what we can to make life better for others, but where I take issue is when it's demanded, or forced. That whole "redistribution of wealth" concept really doesn't work...just take a look at the countries who practice it. I can't say standing in line for hours to buy bread is really good for the collective. Life, by its very nature, is unfair! And there is nothing that any law, mandate, referendum, policy or political correctness can do to change that.

But that's what those inflicted with Entitlement Mentality apparently believe...that others, who may work harder (or just work, as the case may be), who become successful through educational opportunities (that are available to everyone, by the way, although some will just have to work harder than others to achieve success), planning, and making wise choices for themselves, have to hand over the wealth they accumulate to people who don't take advantage of education, don't work hard at improving their lives, fail to plan, and make irresponsible decisions. Simply because they have what others do not. It really drives me nuts!

Of course, there are all kinds of situations and exceptions and people who really are down on their luck in spite of doing the right things. Those aren't the ones I'm talking about here. They are the kind of people who will accept help, but still do what they can do get out of their situation and improve their lot in life. It's the ones who won't work, won't go to school, won't be responsible for themselves or the babies they create, and then expect everyone who has what they want and can't have, because of their own choices and irresponsibility, to cover their living expenses, pay their medical bills and buy them food. Or expect the government to do it for them.

Am I saying that those who are blessed with abundant financial means should keep it to themselves and never help anyone? Absolutely not! I believe part of being responsible with wealth includes giving to the poor and helping the less fortunate. As one with a heart to give to others as I am able, I consider it a blessing to be able to do just that. And as a follower of Christ, I know that it is my responsibility, my duty, to serve others and give.

When did we go from a nation of people proud of working hard to become successful to a nation of people who expect the government, or the very wealthy, to provide for their every need? When did the role of government change from its proper role, to prevent crime and lawlessness, to its perceived role of Nanny, of Provider? Why have so many Americans fallen victim to Entitlement Mentality?

The proper role of government is to restrain crime of every sort. The problem of government is that it becomes the perpetrator of the very crimes it is supposed to restrain, except on a massive scale. This is why the Founders established the Constitution. Its purpose is to restrain government, giving it limited, enumerated authority. The purpose of government is not to redistribute the private property of its citizens, or to provide a benefit to one class of citizen, at the expense of the rest. When this happens, all classes begin to demand special benefits using the police power of government to extract it from their fellow citizens until you have anarchy. ~ Our Republic (emphasis mine)

It is really sad to see this nation deteriorating and deviating from the principles on which it was founded. It is sad to see people, who have so much to offer our country and our world, fall victim to hopelessness and despair and the illusion of security provided by our government. And it is absolutely maddening to hear people whining about the fact that others have more than they do. There will always be those who have and those who have not. At least in America...for the time being...you have opportunities to leave the Have Nots and join the Haves, if only you were to quit your whining, get off your butt, and do something about it.

If you expect the government to do for you what you should be doing for yourself, don't be surprised when you end up broke, homeless and ill. It's inevitable. Just look at Washington, DC...

~yeah, I said that...

Make it Yourself and Save Money!

2010-11-08T23:20:00.000-05:00

I just added a post to my Purposeful Nourishment blog on making your own cream of mushroom soup, plus I've included a recipe for Taco Seasoning and my mother in law's famous Burrito Casserole. Come check it out!

Kicking the Can(ned Cream of Mushroom Soup): A Healthy Alternative + 2 BONUS Recipes!

WE HAVE A WINNER!! Congratulations!

2010-11-02T07:59:00.000-04:00

(Due to technical difficulties on November 1, the winner of the Really Woolly Kids DVD giveaway was chosen just now...thanks to ClassTools.net Random Name/Word Picker)

AMANDA, you're the lucky winner!

Please contact me with your address so I can send it out to you! Thanks again for following my blog and for entering the giveaway, I know your kids will love this DVD!

Boys

2010-11-01T13:44:00.000-04:00

Originally, I didn't want to have children. I didn't want to sacrifice my freedom, I absolutely adored sleep, and I didn't want to bring another innocent life into this crazy world. God had other plans in store for me, though!

I now have five kids...three stepsons - 20, 18 and 16...a daughter, 10 and one boy of my very own, who is almost 3. God is funny like that, really.

When I was pregnant with my daughter, and before I knew she was a she, I was pretty sure she'd be a boy, given her father's track record...and his family's, it's just absolutely fraught with boys...in fact, even at the ultrasound I had just before being induced, to see if she was big enough, they said she was a girl. I said "I'll believe it when I see it!" I was so relieved when I saw that she was, indeed, a girl. At that point in my life, I don't think I could have handled a boy.

I didn't really want to have a boy. Boys are strange, foreign creatures. They like dirt, rocks, army men, sticks and guns and noise. I don't really like those things, so how am I to relate to someone who does? How do I get past the rambunctious, infinite energy...the things that get broken...the dirt...

Two of my stepsons live with us, and we have a long, complicated family history. It hasn't always been pretty. We haven't always gotten along so well. But I've been praying for restoration in our family, and for reconciliation between my stepsons and I. That's a tall order, especially at the stage of life they are in now!

And recently, they all had birthdays. This year the idea popped into my head to make them whatever they want for breakfast. Oldest Boy's birthday was on a Saturday, and the way the day went we ended up having his birthday breakfast for supper...but hey, pancakes and bacon from the best butcher shop around is good any time of day!

The next birthday was for Youngest Boy, who turned 16. He wanted cinnamon rolls, hot wings and chocolate milk. So I made cinnamon rolls...that almost didn't turn out, but then ended up being really yummy...and cheated a bit on the wings, I got frozen ones and nuked them. He said that was ok, so I went ahead and took the shortcut.

And Middle Boy, who is a well-known carnivore, wanted steak and bacon and scrambled eggs and cheese. So, I made a New York Strip steak, two pounds of bacon (like anyone else around would stay out of the bacon...had to make sure there was enough!) and scrambled eggs and cheese. His friend joined him and ate the eggs, Birthday Boy was quite full of steak and bacon.

I got some of the best compliments...the youngest one (who told me his friends are jealous because I make him breakfast every morning before school) thought the cinnamon rolls were awesome, when Middle Boy walked in the house (he's the one not living with us), he said after checking out the steak, "Dawn knows the way to a man's heart", Middle Boy's friend said "why can't my mom cook as good as you?", to which Middle Boy said it's because "she puts a lot of love in it." That really made my day. Because I really did put a lot of love in all three meals. And I meant it.

I realized after reflecting on all this Birthday Breakfast stuff that I felt rather maternal toward them. I'm not actually their mother, and even "stepmother" is more of a title than anything. I wondered if this is how moms with a bunch of teenage boys feel, when they're cooking their sons' favorite meals. It was nice. God has opened my eyes recently to the wonders of my stepsons. They really are terrific young men. I'm glad that God has put them in my life.

And so, this gives me hope for my own son, who is in the same moment endearing and exasperating, loving and annoying, cute and rotten. I still haven't figured out what makes a boy tick, but I know the way to his heart is through his stomach...thank you, Lord, for giving me the ability to cook! And thank you for all these boys in my life, and what I have learned from them...and what I will learn in the years to come. They have added a dimension to my life I never knew existed, and for that I am truly grateful.

Confessions of an SLS Junkie: How I Went No-Poo

2010-10-31T17:47:00.000-04:00

Have you heard of the No-Poo movement? It's quite interesting. I gave it a whirl, then did a guest post about it on my friend's blog, The Homesteading Hippy...come check it out! Really, her hubby read it and just totally cracked up. You'll love it, I promise! Just click that link down below there...

Confessions of an SLS Junkie: How I Went No-Poo

I WON! But did I REALLY Want This?

2010-10-28T23:43:00.000-04:00

Do you have a lot of luck signing up for all those giveaways on the web? Until just the other day, I've never won a thing. I was so excited that I finally won a blog giveaway! But...

I have to be honest, I entered the giveaway thinking I wouldn't win anyway, and it was helping out a friend of mine. No biggie. I honestly didn't really WANT what was being given away...not that it's a horrible thing, but, well, you'll see in a minute what I'm talking about.

The prize was a Mend Mark Bracelet. Jewelry! Everyone loves jewelry, right? But, there's something different about this one. It has a specific purpose. One that kind of hits a little too close to the truth of who I really am. And the responsibility I have as what I profess to be.

The mend mark is a distinctive wristband designed with the purpose of resembling one of the five scars of Jesus. The band features circular disks that are positioned at each side of the wrist. The intent of these is to simulate one of the holes that was instrumental in killing a King. The purpose of bearing this symbol is to emphasize the importance of His sacrifice and prompt us to never forget the role that it continuously plays in our lives.

It also reminds me of how much I am NOT like Jesus in my everyday things...thoughts, words, actions. How I deal with frustrations, challenges, my children, and people who have hurt me. I don't really want to be reminded of those things.

I also have to remember that people who don't know anything about the God I serve are seeing my actions (or reactions), hearing my words...to what conclusion do they come? That Christians are no different than the rest of the world? If that's the case, why bother?

I know that I don't have to wear it, and I surely don't want to sound ungrateful...I just thought how ironic is that? Entering a contest because I don't think I'll win anyway, only to win something that makes me a bit uncomfortable in my skin. My daughter, when she was three, said something so profound once. She had done something naughty and when I asked her why she did it, she said "my skin made me do it." It didn't hit me until later that she was right on. That pesky flesh can sometimes make us do things we really shouldn't.

After I put the bracelet on, I was looking at it and thinking about how God sure has one strange sense of humor sometimes. And how he always knows what we need, even when we're clueless. He said to me...

I'm going to mend all that is broken in your life. Stand still and watch me work.

This echoed what I'd read just a few days before, while praying about several things that need mending...mending that is beyond my ability...

2 Chronicles 20:17 (Amplified Bible)
¹⁷You shall not need to fight in this battle; take your positions, stand still, and see the deliverance of the Lord [Who is] with you, O Judah and Jerusalem. Fear not nor be dismayed. Tomorrow go out against them, for the Lord is with you.

So now, I am also reminded of what Christ's sacrifice has done for me and for all who accept it. It means that I have a powerful intermediary working on my behalf, one who always wins! And when God says to stand back and watch him work, what a relief that is. I would mess it up, for sure. I have a long track record of doing just that. But he is faithful, even when I am not. He is always there, even when I turn away. And he is true to his word.

Thanks, God...now, about all those other blog giveaways I've entered...

DVD REVIEW and GIVEAWAY!!: Really Woolly Kids' TRUSTING IN THE SHEPHERD

2010-10-18T21:04:00.000-04:00

You're probably familiar with Dayspring products, such as their cards and gifts, but did you know they produce DVDs too? I recently got the chance to review their Really Woolly Kids DVD, Trusting in the Shepherd.

Geared for kids aged 3-8, it features two engaging stories that teach children about trusting in Jesus, our Shepherd, through the adventures of the gang at Woollyville, including Gracie, Jacob, and Grandma Tabitha.

In the first episode, Gracie learns to trust the Shepherd while on a Ewe Scout campout in the dark, scary woods. The second episode is where Jacob learns to trust the Shepherd while dealing with a "bully" at school. Both episodes are wonderful illustrations of Psalm 23:4, easily understandable by children:

Psalm 23:4 (New Living Translation)

⁴ Even when I walk
      through the darkest valley,^[a]
   I will not be afraid,
      for you are close beside me.
   Your rod and your staff
      protect and comfort me.

I judge a kid's DVD by two criteria....what does it teach my child, and does it capture and engage my child's attention? I like the message of Trusting in the Shepherd, fear is not an easy subject to broach with very young children. And I particularly liked that my almost-three-year-old was enthralled with it. I'm talking sitting still for both episodes. That is on the order of a Miracle of Truly Biblical Proportions. Akin to the Parting of the Red Sea, in my book.

And then there is a catchy song..."The Fear Not Song"...I find myself humming and singing it throughout the day and the kids will join in. I think it will even help me to fear not, as well! I also have to mention the great price, too...just $9.99.

I give this DVD a definite thumbs up! Be sure to visit the Really Woolly Kids website and their Facebook page too!

And now...I'm so excited to be able to do a GIVEAWAY on my blog! Since I generously received two copies of this great DVD, I have one to give away to one lucky reader. I hate complicated giveaways, so I'll make this really simple. You can earn two entries by doing the following:

Follow my blog. If you already follow me, great! Just leave a comment saying so. If you're just joining, thanks!! Let me know that, too.

And, a bonus entry for every friend of yours who follows my blog (and they can enter too, of course!), just tell them to leave a comment telling me who kindly sent them my way.

My birthday is in November, and to celebrate, I decided to extend the time to sign up for this giveaway so I can give this DVD to someone in November!

I'll be choosing the winner on MONDAY, ~~OCTOBER 25~~ NOVEMBER 1, 2010. Good luck!

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"Disclosure of Material Connection: I received one or more of the products or services mentioned above for free in the hope that I would mention it on my blog. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guidelines concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."

DVD REVIEW: The Mysterious Islands: A Testimony to God's Hand in Creation

2010-10-10T18:55:00.000-04:00

Do you remember high school science say, oh, a couple decades ago (or longer)? What did you learn about how our universe came to be? I remember the big debate in the late '80s was whether or not the theory of evolution could be taught. Now, only twenty years or so later, it's taught as fact! Evolution has always seemed a bit off to me, always leaving me with the sense that something was missing...but not the supposed Missing Link for which scientists have been searching for years. The Biblical account of Creation in six days almost seems too fantastic to be real, made more difficult for Christian students by the evolutionary bent that is present in public school science curriculum. Could this theory of evolution somehow explain how God created the universe? Can there be a marriage between Science and the Bible? Watching The Mysterious Islands helped answer that question definitively in my mind.

Released on August 31, 2010 by Provident Films (who also brought us Facing the Giants and Fireproof), The Mysterious Islands is a documentary that challenges Darwin's findings during his exploration and study of the Galapagos Islands and the amazing creatures that live there. Calling the Galapagos "The Jerusalem of Evolution", Doug Phillips journeys with his 16 year old son Joshua and a Christian team of scientists to these incredible Islands to follow Darwin's path of discovery over 150 years ago. They beautifully answer the question, "Is the Galapagos a laboratory for evolution or a glorious testimony to God's creation?"

The cinematography is breath-taking, soaring over the islands and diving deep into the surrounding oceans to capture some of the most beautiful and amazing creatures on earth. There are thought-provoking discussions on faith, modern science, and insight into how Darwin came to the conclusions that forever changed science, helped shaped the environmental movement and altered the very fabric of society itself.

This film is a terrific resource for homeschoolers, youth groups, church small groups or for anyone searching for the truth amid the myriad scientific "evidence" abounding to explain the origins of life and how our universe began. A discussion guide is available to download, as well.

Our family thoroughly enjoyed this documentary, especially my ten year old daughter, a budding scientist. After watching The Mysterious Islands, I am convinced that a marriage between Darwin's conclusions and the Biblical account of Creation is an unholy union. I plan to use this DVD as part of our homeschool science curriculum and am excited to have a resource that both encourages me to explore this topic even more and arms me with a defense against evolutionary theory....which, by the way, has yet to actually be proven!

Something to think about:  Does it bother you that your children are being taught a theory as fact, especially since the "fairness" that is demanded to allow teaching of, say, alternative lifestyles or other "faith traditions", for example is blatantly ignored when it comes to including Creationism in public school science curriculum? What far-reaching implications will that have on future generations? Are you satisfied to blindly accept popularly held theories and conclusions or are you willing to dig deeper, to measure such theories and conclusions against God's Word? And when you find discrepancies, what will you do next?

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"Disclosure of Material Connection: I received one or more of the products or services mentioned above for free in the hope that I would mention it on my blog. I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16CFR, Part 255 Guidelines Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."

DIY: Make Your Own Homeschool Planner

2010-09-06T17:38:00.001-04:00

Anyone who knows me well knows that organization is something that really does not come naturally for me. Last year, I used the homeschool planner from Home Educating Family called The Well Planned Day. I really liked it, but, as I find with pre-designed planners in general, there's always a lot of the pages I don't use. Maybe that says more about myself and my "organizational" style than the overall design of the planner, but either way I end up with a lot of wasted pages. [Did it work? Or did I still end up with wasted pages? Check out my new and revised planner for the 2011-12 school year and find out!]

I came across a great tutorial over at Dynamic 2 Moms that shows how to make your own planner (which was moved to their sister site, New Beginnings) as well as tons of other great resources! That idea had never occurred to me, so I was quite excited to discover that I could design a planner that would have exactly what I wanted in it and none of what I didn't. I was also very pleased to find out that I could do this for a fraction of the cost of buying a planner. It really wasn't all that difficult, either. I did make some mistakes along the way, but now at least I know what NOT to do!

Here's some pictures of my new planner:

Click on a photo to see a larger view

Front cover, 11" x11" laminated cardstock

Front cover. This was double-laminated because the employee at Office Max made a mistake. Actually I think I prefer it that way, it's sturdier!

Yearly calendar, timeanddate.com

Starting things off with a yearly calendar with some holidays highlighted. Like that wretched Dumb Stupid Time we are now forced to observe. I never know when that is, usually.

Attendance record, DonnaYoung.org

School attendance record. This one is broken down by month, but you could use any format you like of course. Last year I had it all on one sheet, but in a landscape orientation. Didn't like that so much.

The section dividers I designed myself, with a verse relating to the section

Course Objectives section. This is where I'll write out our goals for each subject of study and ideas for fun/interesting activities or events.

Course objectives sheet, one for each subject of study. Form is from the free curriculum planner at New Beginnings

The course objectives sheets also include a section for an end of year evaluation.

Monthly calendar before each month's weeks of lessons

I was able to customize this calendar at www.somacon.com

Lesson Planner section. I have 52 weeks of planning sheets so we can continue with year-round schooling. There's a monthly calendar at the beginning of each month. This is one area I made a mistake in, because of how I put together the planner sheets. I'll explain that next.

Class Schedule. Form is available on DonnaYoung.org in a type-able PDF

Weekly Goals and Review. I adapted this form from one on New Beginnings

To help me with accountability, I also included a sheet that has Weekly Goals for each subject and a Weekly Review. I'll write down what we should accomplish that week in the goals section, and in the review I'll make note of what we actually did, where we missed the mark (just in case that happens lol), and any deviations from the goals and why. There's also an area to keep track of behavior as well. My husband will ask to see this every week to help me stay on track. I printed the class schedule sheets and the weekly goals/review sheets double sided, reasoning that I'll just put the sheets in alternating. That was fine, until I decided to add the monthly calendar sheets. So I had to take out a few and reprint them with the calendar on one side and the required schedule/weekly sheet on the other.

Field Trip log sheet from DonnaYoung.org

Extra Curricular section. This would include field trips, organizations and social enrichment activities, such as Girl Scouts, Keepers At Home club, etc. All of these section dividers were supposed to be in sheet protectors, but the employee at Office Max couldn't get the sheet protectors to punch right when he tried to put the holes in them for binding. So, I had to come up with another plan for that. This section was also to have extra sheet protectors and a baseball card sheet protector to hold memorabilia, brochures, and business cards we pick up on field trips or outings.

Support and Groups section. I have information for Friday School here and the homeschool group we belong to, plus an address section to record contact information of other homeschoolers we meet.

Mead Zwipes pocket, front

Mead Zwipes, back pocket

Zwipes pocket. I picked up several of these at a local Amish discount store a couple years ago, but haven't found a good use for them until now. You're supposed to stick them in a notebook, but I didn't like how the side stuck way out so we haven't used them. But it works perfectly in my planner! The pocket attaches to the coil. You can put a sheet of something behind the front and the back side is like a folder pocket. The marker is really neat, too. You write on the pocket, but it doesn't smear or rub off like a dry erase marker. It won't go anywhere until you use the special eraser tip on one end (it's wet like a marker, but dissolves the ink) and then wipe it off with the dry-erase eraser style tip of the other cap. It works on regular plastic sheet protectors, too. I don't know if they still make them, I couldn't find them on Mead's website and searching on the internet didn't bring up much, either. But just as I typed that, I glanced down at the unopened package of Zwipes I had on my desk and found this web address, which does still work: www.MeadZwipes.com

Since I couldn't add the sheet protectors like I wanted to (and there's some conjecture here that I most certainly could have had it done that way if a) the Office Max employee knew what he was doing or b) their equipment was properly sharpened. But, since I didn't have the time or desire to run around the county to find a place to do it that way, I decided to figure out something on my own. Since the cover of my planner is 11" x 11", I have plenty of room inside. I put 3 slits in the back cover and pushed brass paper fasteners through the slits. Then I put my sheet protectors in. This ended up being my Household Management section.

Daily Schedule from Dynamic 2 Moms.
It's also available in pretty colors, too!

Morning-Noon Schedule from DonnaYoung.org

Menu planner and shopping list from Money Saving Mom, part of a free download of 14 different menu planning forms

Household Management section. Here I have a daily schedule (I use the Zwipes marker to add or change things. I will have to do this every day, so hopefully it will become a habit!) I got this sheet from Dynamic 2 Moms. Some of the other sheets in the planner are from Donna Young, a great resource of free printable planners, schedules, etc. for homeschooling and organizing life in general. I also have a Morning-Noon schedule that I found on Donna Young's site. I'm working on tweaking it to fit our home and schedule. It's kind of like a Flylady plan, but all on one sheet of paper. Then I have my menu planner/shopping list, and extra sheet protectors.

Back cover, calendar laminated on 11" x 11" cardstock
Calendar is from the free curriculum planner at New Beginnings

Back Cover. I decided to put an extra yearly calendar there so I know if I ever need a calendar, I just have to flip the planner over and there it is. I don't have to turn pages and look for it. Call it lazy if you want. I prefer to call it efficient. I hate messing around looking for things! I spend way too much time doing that as it is, so if I can find a way to NOT do that, I'm doing myself a huge favor.

Post-it Durable Filing/Divider Tabs

Another great product I used is the Post-it Durable Filing Tabs. They are reusable, though I'm sure eventually they won't stick anymore, but I can take them out of the old planner and put them in the new one the next year. I can also change things as necessary without too much fuss. I love that!

So, there you have it. My new homeschool/family planner. It cost me less than $10! $5 and some change at Office Max for the binding and laminating, and a few dollars (maybe) more for the paper and ink I printed out at home. You can easily spend $20 or much more on a pre-designed planner, whether it's a PDF file you print yourself or one that is already printed, bound and mailed to you. I'm hoping it works well, and I'm already thinking of modifications and additions for next year's planner. There's no end to the possibilities for personalization (if I had found this sooner, I'd have done it a little differently, but I had to get it put together before we start school!) such as pictures and scrapbooking-styled pages, dividers, etc. It was a lot of fun, too!

2010-09-06T12:03:00.000-04:00

FOR TODAY...Labor Day, September 6, 2010

Outside my window...cloudy, cool, reminds me of Autumn...
I am thinking...about what God taught me this weekend on enjoying my children
I am thankful for...revelations in the strangest of places
From the learning rooms...planner is done (put together and bound), need to get the rest of the week planned out
From the kitchen...dd is making pancakes...she makes really good "cake-cakes" as her little brother calls them
I am wearing...comfy clothes
I am creating...a plan of attack for dealing with the Room of Mathoms
I am going...nowhere today, it's a stay home and relax day (after the housework gets done!)
I am reading...Devotions for Homeschool Moms
I am hoping...my in-laws have a good trip back home to Arizona
I am hearing...the sounds of traffic, pancake flipping, and toddler demands
Around the house...lots of straightening up to be done
One of my favorite things...early morning snuggles with my little boy, good morning kisses from my (not so) little girl
A few plans for the rest of the week: Start school Tuesday, ladies over Tuesday night, Friday School starts
Here is picture for thought I am sharing...

The recipe is called The Best Peanut Butter Oatmeal Cookies and they're not kidding!